Is this thread about courting or about the legality of 'no means no'? I'm going to discuss the former.
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Originally Posted by guccilvr
I don't think "courting" is dead. I think it just advances more rapidly now. In the old days (yes I use that term lightly) it was a drawn out process almost like a job interview. In todays society, people move and respond at a much faster pace and don't have time for all the "application" types of rituals.
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While I too agree that courting is dead (and I consider courting and dating to mean different things, but by dating I mean exclusively dating the same person over a period of time) I think that dating is very important if what you're looking for a long term relationship that ends in marriage or mutual exclusivity.
My wife and I dated for close to four years before we got married. After a few months of dating we realized we wanted to get married, but we weren't ready, or able at that time. Our aim and intention was to get married, so we used the dating time to get to know one another, to ensure that if we were to get married we would be compatable. For close to one full year of those four years of dating the two of us were at least 15 hours away from each other, and we remained in contact solely through the phone, e-mail, and letters. I believe that period was crucial for us. We actually learned about each other. We were able to express our feelings, thoughts etc. in a different way than if we were in the same room. Not to say that we preferred this method all the time (obviously we'd rather have been together), but while it was our circumstance we made the most of it, and really found it to be a good thing for us.
I realize my circumstances are different than most. I realize that dating and relationships have changed a lot over the last generation. But I just thought that I would add that some people still date, and enter into long term relationships with the intention of marrying that person one day.