Jinn

I often have this problem, and it has of course resurfaced in my current relationship with my girlfriend. Often, I'll be doing something completely innocent, but circumstances make it seem sketchy...

Last night, I was at home, minding my own business and playing video games, when I got a phone call. It was Robyn! Robyn is a old friend who I "had a thing for" for a solid year. Life interceded and I decided she wasn't and would never be worth my time. A year later, I met my current girlfriend and we've enjoyed 5 months (thus far) of mutual bliss. She wanted me to come hang out with her and her friends at their new house. Surely enough I wanted to get some social interaction, because it'd been awhile. I agreed and made my way down towards their house. About 5 minutes before arriving, I got a call on my cell phone.. it was my aforementioned special lady.

Now what?

I really felt little guilt about going to Robyn's house, as my girlfriend has met her and knows about my long-past crush, as well as our relationship boundaries. She's a mildly jealous SO, but the last time I went to Robyn's.. I brought her along and she gave me what appeared to be a "seal of approval." That said, Robyn's party was relatively exclusive and I wasn't sure if my SO was invited on this current occasion. I'm presented with a few choices:

1) Don't answer the call.
Having just passed the fifth month of our relationship, I'd hardly consider blatantly ignoring a call from her. She's not a hit-and-run and I certainly love talking to her. The advantage, here, however.. is that I she doesn't have to know where I've gone. The disadvantage, however, is that I want her to know; I'd hate for her to find out LATER and think something shady occured.

2) Answer the call, but don't tell her I'm going to Robyn's.
This option is probably the worst, as it seems to provide solid evidence if she realizes later that I've gone to Robyn's and I didn't tell her. Again, I want her to know *now* so that she doesn't think I'd break our boundaries.

3) Answer the call, and tell her I'm going to Robyn's.
This is the solution I inevitably arrived at. I want her to know where I'm going, I want to talk to her, and she's calling me. Answer the damn phone, Jinn! The problem herein is that now she knows I'm going to Robyn's, and the opus is on me to invite her.

I don't want to tell her that I'm going to a party and not invite her, because that is a sucky feeling. Similarly, I would like to hang out with my friends by myself, as well. However, I want her to know where I'm going so that it doesn't cause undue worry. But by telling her, I've just caused the first problem to happen!!

To further clarify, I love emotional20 and I couldn't even imagine breaking our boundaries -- I want her be informed about my whereabouts, but I'd like to be alone. I'd like her to know where I'm going, without feeling bad for not bringing her along.

What would you do in this situation? It feels like there is a simpler answer...

(P.S. I'm stopping by her house later to talk about this, but I wondered what TFPer's approach would have been...)

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