Sage

It sounds like the 14 year old just needs some parents. His real father doesn't sound like that great of a guy to begin with, and every boy I've ever seen at that age is really awkward and rebellious and has a head full of hormones. So, step in and be the hero- educate this kid about stuff, make sure he knows what's real and what's not, what's good and bad (you can debate this one with your wife all night long, I won't start here), and that you can't make LSD from a sitck of gum and a rotten orange (one of my friends is a grad school Chem major and still thinks you can). I really like some of the things people have said on here about giving them boundaries, and then letting them do whatever they want within those boundaries. That's a really good way to make sure your kids grow up respecting you- you're letting them explore, but you're keeping them safe while they're doing it. I wish my parents had been more like that- they never actually *told* me what the boundaries were, so I grew up feeling like there were certian things I couldn't talk about with them, sex being the main thing. This led to an uncomfortable and unfortunate ignorance on my part as to how to relate to my parents, something I'm still dealing with and I'm 22.

Good luck, and remember- everyone was 14 at one point in time!

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