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Old 07-19-2005, 10:02 AM   #20 (permalink)
Cynthetiq
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Location: Manhattan, NY
Quote:
Originally Posted by JinnKai
Let me all you remind you the legality of this issue. Contrary to what you may BELIEVE is justified, in most states you cannot record a convseration that you are "not a party to." In the case of a phone, this means that if you're not a known participant or listener then you CANNOT record the conversation. Just because it is your phone does not excuse this type of wiretapping (read: spying). If someone else uses your phone and you record it without their consent, it is illegal. I might be a bit biased on this issue as a privacy advocate for the EFF, but monitoring your children's behavior like this is absolutely ridiculous. "Fuck shit damn ass cunt bitch whore.. " if you're really worried that your kid is talking about this online.. he's doing it at school.

ACTION, not REACTION. Good parenting would be letting your children make their own decisions. I know too many "adults" who need constant guidance and handholding because their parents never let them do things without Daddy watching over. If you properly explained to your children about things like sex and drugs and violence and chauvinism BEFORE letting them on the Internet, then monitoring them is a moot point. It's a power issue, and you want to be the one making the rules.. its as simple as that. If your son or daughter knows what SEX is, how it works, how to abstain, or how to use effective contraception.. then that conversation about sex with his friends shouldn't worry you. He's not being misinformed by some illiterate "d00d" in a chatroom. Likewise if you've educated your children about internet safety -- don't give out your real name, use aliases, uses alphanumeric passwords.. don't talk to strangers. These are all concepts we're familiar with in the "real world" and you are simply failing to teach your children these. Children are FAR smarter and rational then we give them credit for, assuming they've been educated. The action is education, the reaction is spying.

The only positive influence this would have is to make your child more computer literate. I know if I were confronted with these types of logging or website blocking, I would immediately attempt to remove them. They're illegal on adults.. just because they're your kids doesn't mean you have to treat them like shit.

StanT, I am certainly not attacking your method of monitoring. Informing your children that it is there is far MUCH better parenting them installing it covertly. The only reason for making your installation secret is that you WANT to catch your son or daughter doing something "questionable".. not because you want to be a good parent. Its akin to any system of laws... if you don't inform people that murdering someone is illegal, and instead wait until they murder someone so you can 'catch' them.. its unfair and unenforceable. If you let them know ahead of time, they can actually use that to make better decisions. If you know your father is watching you, that will factor into your decision to click Big Black Guy Dicks.com ...


...They really do need a 100-hour certification class before you can be parents..
First, know the laws of the state you are in. Linda Tripp got herself into some hot water for not knowing.

I live in NYC, it's a SINGLE PARTY STATE which means that I do not have to get permission from ANYONE. Me telling someone is just a courtesy and I cannot tell you how many times I've SURPRISED people with transcripts of conversations and details they claim they never said. They don't believe the transcript, I play the tape.

Second, a parent can also just say NO TV, NO PHONE, NO COMPUTER, if they so choose to. Other kids will ridicule them but I have seen it happen when I was growing up. Observing how your children interact with each other and the world is important in understanding how to "compromise" as people have said in previous threads and posts.

Third, I agree with the certification but unfortunately you'll have some people who will insist that religion and "intelligent design" is included in tht 100 hours.
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