Things that worked for me...
1. Make sure you've gone pee. I was always terrified (not really, just more "aware") of an accident before I began having them regularly. Orgasms, not accidents.
2. Talking dirty. I wasn't ever much into talking dirty myself, but just listening to my partner talking can get me off with little else.
3. Experiment with positions and methods. I climax much faster with certain combinations of pressure, stimulation, etc. It was just trial and error. When I found a winning combo, it finally became fun to try to come up with others.
4. Having the proper temperature. I cannot climax if I'm cold, so I try to make sure that the room's comfortably warm or move to a room that is. Obviously this works both ways - hot to cold, cold to hot).
5. Focus more of your attention on the sensations INSIDE of your vagina. The first time I did this I was shocked and in serious doubt that I'd ever really FELT anything down there. I'd been more preoccupied with hands, bodies, noises, etc., that I just wasn't aware of the feeling beyond initial penetration.
6. Contract your lower abs like you're squeezing your entire workings down there (uterus, vaginal canal, etc.). Not sure exactly why, but I think this is simply part of number 5).
I'm sure I could probably go on and on, but like the ladies above have already stated, it's pretty much dependent on your comfort level and ability to "let go." It will cum (har har). All of this might sound insanely silly to you. But hey, it's what works for me and maybe something here will move you a step closer.
Best of luck.
