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TM875 · 06-12-2005, 08:46 AM

Geez, how to handle this....

My first impression is that it would be in both of your best interests to give it up. First of all, three weeks is not really long enough to be considering any major lifetime-changing decisions in order to be with this girl. Secondly, post-college long distance relationships have a very hard time working out, simply because you both now have so many more pressing distractions in your life. Boy, you better believe med school is hard - couple the studying with her desire to have a little bit of a social life while there, and you've lost any time open for you. Likewise, flight school isn't a cakewalk, either. There will be plenty of nights when your brain is so fried that you want nothing but to slip into a nice, peaceful coma for a decade or two.

The second thought I had, though, is that if you're so serious about her (hence why you're writing this thread), and she seems so serious about you (right?), then there might be a chance. You didn't say where she goes to school...is the drive longer than just a few hours? If you legitimatly think that you can make that committment a couple of times a month, and think that she would make the same committment to 1) Find time for you when you visit and 2) Remain faithful to you when you're far, far away , then give it a shot. Just don't invest too much into it, and don't be upset if it crumbles.

Another pressing matter is, if you see this going long-term (and if you don't, then why are you wasting your time now), what type of future living arrangements are you seeing yourselves in? Are you going to live together next summer? Do you have your own apartment in St. Louis that she can crash in when school lets out? You guys are adults now - you have to start living in this relationship as if you were two grown people. If you do not see yourselves living in the same area when her school is not in session, and/or can't see yourself moving to wherever it is that she's attending med school (remember: several years of residency is coming up), then you should probably save yourself the trouble and pain now and end it. There's plenty of single girls in St. Louis - don't forsake part of your life now for something that you may regret three, four, or five years in the future.

06-12-2005, 08:46 AM	#2 (permalink)
TM875 Addict Location: Amish-land, PA	Geez, how to handle this.... My first impression is that it would be in both of your best interests to give it up. First of all, three weeks is not really long enough to be considering any major lifetime-changing decisions in order to be with this girl. Secondly, post-college long distance relationships have a very hard time working out, simply because you both now have so many more pressing distractions in your life. Boy, you better believe med school is hard - couple the studying with her desire to have a little bit of a social life while there, and you've lost any time open for you. Likewise, flight school isn't a cakewalk, either. There will be plenty of nights when your brain is so fried that you want nothing but to slip into a nice, peaceful coma for a decade or two. The second thought I had, though, is that if you're so serious about her (hence why you're writing this thread), and she seems so serious about you (right?), then there might be a chance. You didn't say where she goes to school...is the drive longer than just a few hours? If you legitimatly think that you can make that committment a couple of times a month, and think that she would make the same committment to 1) Find time for you when you visit and 2) Remain faithful to you when you're far, far away , then give it a shot. Just don't invest too much into it, and don't be upset if it crumbles. Another pressing matter is, if you see this going long-term (and if you don't, then why are you wasting your time now), what type of future living arrangements are you seeing yourselves in? Are you going to live together next summer? Do you have your own apartment in St. Louis that she can crash in when school lets out? You guys are adults now - you have to start living in this relationship as if you were two grown people. If you do not see yourselves living in the same area when her school is not in session, and/or can't see yourself moving to wherever it is that she's attending med school (remember: several years of residency is coming up), then you should probably save yourself the trouble and pain now and end it. There's plenty of single girls in St. Louis - don't forsake part of your life now for something that you may regret three, four, or five years in the future. __________________ "I've made only one mistake in my life. But I made it over and over and over. That was saying 'yes' when I meant 'no'. Forgive me."