I think there are benefits to both, and a lot depends on the particular people and circumstances of course. I'm far removed from motherhood, but in general I'd say a child especially needs a constant maternal presence in the first few early years.
However, despite the risk of absentee parents, I think it's good for a mother to work in order to provide a role model for her children. This is very personal with me. My mother, despite her excellent education, was only sporadically employed while I was growing up. It wasn't for motherhood reasons entirely, as she fell into the whole counter-culture thinking of the 60s and didn't want to be a part of "the system." Which is all fine and well except that she didn't convey the importance of pursuing a career to little me. I bought into the world view she presented, and it was relatively late in life that I realized that I really should be concerned with the need to "make something" of myself. Plus, a lot of the women I see who don't have much going on outside of the home life seem to turn into these sort of mommy-drones (although thank god my mother wasn't one of these - she did provide lots of intellectual stimulation). I see far too much of this going on:
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by maleficent
I also think that staying home has changed my sister. We have never been close, but her being mommy has taken her identity, life for her is all about shuttling the kids to play groups, or after school activities, or class trips. She never does anything for her. Her friends are all also mommies, if she spends time with non-mommies she has absolutely nothing to say, I don't think she's read a book in years, I know she hasn't read a newspaper, she used to be pretty intelligent, and now she's not.
|
I think one of the more valuable things a parent can do is be interesting and teach their children to think. A lot of women I see staying home and taking care of their kids just have nothing to say anymore. No wonder the children are couch potatoes. Not wanting to insult anyone here, it's just that I fervently believe in maintaining an open and questioning mind, and I am eternally grateful to my mother for teaching me how to think, despite her other shortcomings.
p.s. - amonkie, I just noticed something in your post - my mother managed to get her Masters degree while raising infant me, and I have a friend who just did the same thing. It's possible to do both, apparently.
