Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post

Hektore · 05-31-2005, 07:48 PM

So, I hate writing and never do it, but I need to get better at it. Since no one has ever really taught me how, I'm looking for criticism here. Don't be afraid to not be gentle, just please explain yourself. Here goes....

Yeeeeeehaw! I did it! Not just anyone can be a Marine sniper, there is just too much demand mentally and physically for anyone to get there. However, I did it, I am the elite now. I graduate tomorrow; I'm going to be deployed inside of two weeks. Ever see a five year-old at the gates to Disneyland? That is me right now. I'm ecstatic for an assignment, in the field, defending my country without leaving so much as a hint even exist. I don't know how you can't be excited, my wife is nervous but I'm with the best of the best. I'm as close to unkillable as you can be.

Here I am, finally got my assignment and God is it going to be glorious. It would be a lie to say that I am not nervous at all, but it's more of an anxious nervous than anything. Out in the desert watching a well; a well that is essential for supplying a local militia force we are here to suppress. Simple idea: cut off the well; cut off the water; they have to give up. My wife is now very worried, but I write to her every week letting her know everything is great, that it couldn't be better. She seems to think that disaster is going to strike. "If this well water is really so important, they'll be protecting it won't they?"

Second day in, finally someone is coming. "Everyone on the way to the well is the enemy, any time of day: shoot to kill." Simple, it's like I was born to do it, now just wait for them to get close enough. It's a woman with a baby on her shoulders. A woman, not unlike my wife , something I was raised to protect. Well, I was also raised not to kill and I have orders, besides I'm sure the rest will figure it out when she doesn't come back. The baby will fall far enough if I get the woman. A simple squeeze, and nobody ever has to know.

Two weeks without leaving my cell. Row of bushes on the left, rock face on the right. Not bad for only having five days worth of supplies but not nearly as glorious as the commercial made it seem. I haven't stood up since I laid down that first day. They stopped coming during the day, not that it helps them and it makes sleeping more difficult if not impossible. Up to 11 kills though, any soldier would be proud. Not one man with a gun however, not one man either. All women and children, they must belong to the village where this militia is hiding. Oh well, they wouldn't have me doing this if it didn't need to be. Raised to protect indeed. You ever have a woman who is truly frightened jump into your arms? Greatest feeling in the world because you both know she is safe there. When her head finds that spot on your shoulder, your heart jumps to meet it and you completely forget anything else even exists. It's hard to imagine putting a bullet in that same head, let alone 11 of them. After the first couple you get used to it however, I'm almost numb to it now.

Been home for about 15 hours now, the phone is ringing. She hands it to me, it's my lieutenant calling to apologize. He says that tomorrow there will be a public apology for the bad intel gathered and that he's sorry I had to sit for so long, for no reason. Apparently the militia was just passing through and the village had nothing to do with it. I hang up, dumbfounded and stare quizzically at my wife, to whom I then explain the call at her request. She wraps her arms around me and kisses my cheek. "Well, at least you didn't actually have to shoot anyone, especially now that this is out."

"Right."

05-31-2005, 07:48 PM	#8 (permalink)
Hektore Junkie Location: Greater Harrisburg Area	So, I hate writing and never do it, but I need to get better at it. Since no one has ever really taught me how, I'm looking for criticism here. Don't be afraid to not be gentle, just please explain yourself. Here goes.... Yeeeeeehaw! I did it! Not just anyone can be a Marine sniper, there is just too much demand mentally and physically for anyone to get there. However, I did it, I am the elite now. I graduate tomorrow; I'm going to be deployed inside of two weeks. Ever see a five year-old at the gates to Disneyland? That is me right now. I'm ecstatic for an assignment, in the field, defending my country without leaving so much as a hint even exist. I don't know how you can't be excited, my wife is nervous but I'm with the best of the best. I'm as close to unkillable as you can be. Here I am, finally got my assignment and God is it going to be glorious. It would be a lie to say that I am not nervous at all, but it's more of an anxious nervous than anything. Out in the desert watching a well; a well that is essential for supplying a local militia force we are here to suppress. Simple idea: cut off the well; cut off the water; they have to give up. My wife is now very worried, but I write to her every week letting her know everything is great, that it couldn't be better. She seems to think that disaster is going to strike. "If this well water is really so important, they'll be protecting it won't they?" Second day in, finally someone is coming. "Everyone on the way to the well is the enemy, any time of day: shoot to kill." Simple, it's like I was born to do it, now just wait for them to get close enough. It's a woman with a baby on her shoulders. A woman, not unlike my wife , something I was raised to protect. Well, I was also raised not to kill and I have orders, besides I'm sure the rest will figure it out when she doesn't come back. The baby will fall far enough if I get the woman. A simple squeeze, and nobody ever has to know. Two weeks without leaving my cell. Row of bushes on the left, rock face on the right. Not bad for only having five days worth of supplies but not nearly as glorious as the commercial made it seem. I haven't stood up since I laid down that first day. They stopped coming during the day, not that it helps them and it makes sleeping more difficult if not impossible. Up to 11 kills though, any soldier would be proud. Not one man with a gun however, not one man either. All women and children, they must belong to the village where this militia is hiding. Oh well, they wouldn't have me doing this if it didn't need to be. Raised to protect indeed. You ever have a woman who is truly frightened jump into your arms? Greatest feeling in the world because you both know she is safe there. When her head finds that spot on your shoulder, your heart jumps to meet it and you completely forget anything else even exists. It's hard to imagine putting a bullet in that same head, let alone 11 of them. After the first couple you get used to it however, I'm almost numb to it now. Been home for about 15 hours now, the phone is ringing. She hands it to me, it's my lieutenant calling to apologize. He says that tomorrow there will be a public apology for the bad intel gathered and that he's sorry I had to sit for so long, for no reason. Apparently the militia was just passing through and the village had nothing to do with it. I hang up, dumbfounded and stare quizzically at my wife, to whom I then explain the call at her request. She wraps her arms around me and kisses my cheek. "Well, at least you didn't actually have to shoot anyone, especially now that this is out." "Right." __________________ The advantage law is the best law in rugby, because it lets you ignore all the others for the good of the game.