bubonico

I was kinda wondering how you all feel about this. My girl is unable to reach orgasm through penetration alone. However she tends to think that she should climax most of the time that we have sex. I don't really think it's fair that I should have to go down on her every time either before or after we have sex. I certainly don't mind going down on her in fact I love it, but when I'm doing it all the time and she rarely goes down on me I begin to feel used. I kinda feel like oral sex is oral sex and we should both be doing it about as often as the other does. I can't really help it that an orgasm for me is a byproduct of us having sexual intercourse. Is this a selfish way for me to look at it? Sometimes I feel like I am being totally selfish and it is only right that she should reach orgasm as often as I do. But then other times I start to feel the other way. Another thing is I sometimes feel like maybe she should help herself along a little bit more often. If she wants to have an orgasm she ought to stick her fingers down there during intercourse and get it going. When she does do this she can usually get herself off in like 30 seconds. It usally takes me close to 30 minutes to get her off with my tongue even with plenty of guidance. I hate to put it into these sorts of terms but it seems like she views our sexual encounters as a sort of orgasm count. While I was home she said to me I've only had 7 orgasms since you've been here. I didn't say it but I was thinking "what the fuck I've only been here less than 2 weeks". Granted we were having sex about 2 times a day on average. I was also thinking "you've only gone down on me twice". So I guess I view oral sex as an extra thing that we should both get and she thinks we should both have an equivalent number of orgasms. She said to me one time that she could be just as happy masturbating if she isn't reaching climax. I thought this was a totally unfair thing to say because I know she doesn't sit there and howl in extacy for an hour when she masturbates. I know damn well she enjoys the shit out of sex, she just can't really reach climax from it. She has since apologized about the masturbation comment. If other people could share with me how they feel about this I'd be quite grateful. Just FYI I think in general we have a pretty healthy relationship sexually and otherwise. Most of this stemmed from just one conversation that we had. We've talked about it since and I think we are both pretty well understood. I've told her that I don't need oral sex to be sexually satisfied, and if she does then I should be doing it as often as she desires. I guess I'm just wondering if I'm bending more than I should. Is she being selfish? Am I being selfish? Is there even a right answer here? I've kinda concluded that most couples probably work out different things to keep both partners happy and there is no real advice I can get on this.

__________________
"People sleep peacably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf" -George Orwell