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"He has felt the sting or weight of our displeasure for so long that he can no longer feel it. We have argued with him so many times about trivia, and when no argument was necessary, that he decides that everything we argue about is trivial, and that we argue only because we like to argue."
I think think this is the crucial point here. We really need to balance any criticism or correction with praise and reward. Even if it's just a reward of our pleasure and smile. Tell your child that you appreciate their good behavior. It's hard to remember this part of teaching our children the right way to behave. How will they know the right way if they aren't told they are doing right sometimes. No one likes constant criticism. Everyone enjoys being praised. It's normal for someone to want to behave in a positive way in order to recieve a positive response. We don't have to be a buddy in order to do this.
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"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma. 
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