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She gets angry at our kid, but nowhere near like she does at me. Sometimes I think she expects too much from her, like when she tells her to come here and our daughter doesn't or when she tells her not to take her sunglasses but she does anyway, but then again, she's only two years old. She never hits our child so I'm not worried about that at all and she is a very good mother other than sometimes expecting too much from a two year old.
Divorce has crossed my mind, but the good times are very good and the bad times, while getting more frequent and more draining, are not regular. We also live in a country that she could not stay in if we were to separate (she's on my visa) and I don't think she'd stay here anyway. That would mean that my daughter would leave as well which would kill me. I work full time and often work unpredictable hours, which would mean that I would have to hire a full-time nanny if she were to stay with me. Although I would love to have her live with me, I would rather she was raised by a parent than a nanny even though I'd be with her evenings and weekends. For both of these reasons, I would much rather work through this than divorce.
I've thought about the ultimatum as well, but as I said, she doesn't see that she's doing anything wrong to begin with. Issuing an ultimatum would be the same as just telling her to get out. Although maybe if I made it that definitive she would think twice about it.
I think I'll have a good long talk to her tonight. When she's stressed there's no point even trying to talk to her, so she'd be more receptive now. I'll let you all know how it goes.
Thanks again for replying to me. It makes me feel better to write down my thoughts on this and to hear other's opinions on it.
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