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Old 05-23-2005, 01:17 AM   #33 (permalink)
chickentribs
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Location: Mansion by day/Secret Lair by night
Quote:
Originally Posted by billege
I reject couples who live together but want me to treat them the same as a married couple. I have no problem respecting a couple living together, and I believe in, and honor, their relationship. *Until* they ask me to belive they're the same as a married couple. They have NOT gotten married, yet. When you're married, you say "I will be respoinsible to, and for, this person until I DIE."
That's pretty fucking heavy, and that's why society has held marriage to be a special bond for hundreds of years. It's pretty flippiant to dismiss that. I think.

At any point, an unmarried couple may just walk away from each other. The law has no bind on them, they've never said the vows, they never made that lifelong commitment that marriage is. That's what makes a married couple different than a dating one.

A married couple got up in front of: whatever god they do or don't believe in, friends and family, the government, and said "This is it, until death do us part."

If that makes no difference between dating/living togther, and married, I fear for the whole idea.

Why do you think marriage matters to gay people? There is a difference to being married and dating! There is a validation there that society recognizes. Gay people want society's recognician of their relationships in the form of marriage.

I will not grant dating couples that validation UNTIL they're married, because it makes a difference!

From your last line, which could be considered a parting shot at me, I think you are missunderstanding what I mean when I say "dicking around." I've done the best I can to explain it, I won't waste more of your time.
Billege, I appreciate your thoughts and share the need for sleep... My point is that marriage does not hold the value in society today that it once did, so to give higher regard to a couple based on a marriage license doesn't make sense. It is a shame - I cringe at every episode of "The Bachelor" or "Who Wants to Marry (fill in the blank)", every week-long celeb marriage, and Defense of Marriage proponents who are on wife number 4! I don't disregard the tradition of marriage, but "til death do us part" piece is only heavy when it's true.

Most gay couples I know are pursuing marriage for legal, economic, and equality reasons, not so much to lock down a committment or seek validity from the straight community.

I know I sound cynical, but I actually have great faith in love and families because many of my friends have amazing relationships, and they wouldn't trade their love for 10 Britney Spears weddings! And they deserve all the respect I give them, even without the wedding cake.
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