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so lets see if this is the jist (or is it gist?) of it...
she's controlling and won't let you do things where other females will be in attendence...
and now she's mad that you expressed some insecurity over the fact taht she'd be a 'seemingly' single girl at a small get-together?
if that's summed up right, then my advice is dump the bitch. (bitch not necissarily meant in the derogatory sense, just 'dump the girl' doesn't have the same ring to it).
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shabbat shalom, mother fucker! - the hebrew hammer
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