I think it depends on what the mother wants. If you'd be fulfilled staying home with your kids, then you should absolutely do that. If you long to have a career, then staying at home "for the good of your kids" is a cop-out for you and them. Kids will be happiest when their parents are happy and, as sexymama says, involved. I think young children probably do need at least one stay at home parent until they've established a secure attachment; after that, socialization through a QUALITY day care can be good for them. Every parent should do what they think is best for their individual kid, based on the kid's temperament and the parent's abilities.
If I did have kids I'd like to stay home for at least 18 months, and then work at least part time. I think I might want to home school them at least through elementary school but not by themselves - probably some kind of co-op home school where parents take turns teaching everyone's kids. I don't think I could be a full-time mom, though - I'd go out of my skull. Wait, what am I saying. I don't even want to BE a mom!
