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I do believe the NZ to NC relationship has me beat, but California to Maryland is pretty damned bad. A friend introduced the two of us last may during a vacation out here, and inside of 24 hours we clicked hard, and decided to try things out from there. It's almost been a year now, we're quite serious, and while we've pulled off a couple of month long stints together and a smattering of weekends, it's still been hard as hell.
For me though, I've found the best way to deal with the separation psychologically. is to compartmentalize. We've tried extensive phone-time and AIM, video chat, letters and that was all well and good for a while, but the more emotionally attached I became, the harder the distance was to cope with. The only way I could deal with both parts of my life (my relationship and school), was the shut off the one I couldn't deal directly with. The phone time began to peeter off, we're still on AIM all the time, but there's a lot less contact. It seems that the more of this LD (read: inferior) contact we had, the harder and more acutely I missed being together. It actually caused less pain to talk less.
Thankfully, knowing that neither of us could deal with 3000 miles of separation for long, we looked into other options early, and she's transferring to a school out here so we can be together. So quite soon, tomorrow actually, that era of our relationship will permanently over, and I could not be happier.
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