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Cynthetiq · 04-27-2005, 12:25 PM

Quote:

Not so funny
Parents say a little attitude goes a long way toward problems when their kids pick up the bad habits they see on TV sitcoms.
By Linda Shrieves
Sentinel Staff Writer
LINK
April 27, 2005

The change, Jean Martin recalls, took place last summer. It started when she would ask her children to do something and they'd respond with the dreaded "whatever."

Even minor requests -- "brush your teeth" -- became debates. Her normally well-mannered children, ages 5 and 9, had become sassy. At that moment, Martin found herself in the company of other parents -- those who have discovered that their sweet-tempered little child has turned into .... a sitcom kid. Sassy and spunky, bratty and brilliant.

Oh, for the days of Lassie or The Cosby Show.

Though most TV watchdog groups fret about violence and sex on television, some parents say they're increasingly concerned about TV's attitude problem. From cartoons to sitcoms, the stars are now sassy children who deliver flip one-liners, put ƒè down authority figures and revel in a laugh track.

And their attitudes are contagious. Formerly polite kids are smart-alecky, eye-rolling and harrumphing, just like the kids on television. In Jean and Brian Martin's Longwood home, that behavior came to a quick halt after Jean began paying close attention to her children's TV diet. What she found were shows full of wiseacre kids and nonexistent (or worse, dumb) parents.

"I noticed they were watching the Cartoon Network, which I think is the worst," says Martin. "The parents don't play any roles on the shows, like on Ed, Ed and Eddy or like on Dexter's Laboratory, where the parents are there but the kids run the world." The kids never get punished for their pranks and treat their friends terribly, she says.

When she switched the channel to Nickelodeon, Martin found more of the same.

The Martins quickly limited their kids' tube time to PBS or Animal Planet or the Discovery Channel. And, sure enough, the kids' attitudes improved.

"On TV, the kids are allowed to talk to their parents like they're all one peer group, like they're all on the same level," she says. "That's just not the way it is in our house. We don't debate things with our kids."

Snottiness prevails

At the Parents Television Council offices in Alexandria, Va., five researchers employ VCRs to document network and cable TV shows, noting each incident of foul language and sexual content.

Though parents are most concerned about sex and cursing, research director Melissa Caldwell says parents also are unhappy with TV's latest sitcom formula. "You have this phenomenon on shows such as According to Jim, My Wife and Kids, The Jason Alexander Show, in which the dad is kind of dumb and bumbling and the kids are smarter than the dad," says Caldwell.

"The way they appeal to young viewers is by showing kids who are smart-alecks to their parents," she says. "That's an attitude teenagers are predisposed to."

And given the rise of reality TV, children can learn snottiness from the master: American Idol judge Simon Cowell. The show is one of the top-rated programs among kids 2 to 11.

If there's anything kids do well, it's mimic.

"Psychologists love to slice it up many different ways," says Douglas Gentile, of the National Institute on Media and the Family, a nonpartisan group in Minneapolis. "But it boils down to this: Kids copy what they see on TV."

That's not breaking news to Tina Alenius.

One afternoon, Alenius says, her 5-year-old son was watching a cartoon, when the Winter Springs mom was stunned to hear a character blurt out, "You're such a butthead, Dad." She was more stunned when her son turned around and said, "You're such a butthead, Mom."

Two months ago, Alenius cut her cable service back to the basics: local channels and PBS. Her kids now watch one show each day: PBS' Between the Lions.

"I can't tell you the night-and-day difference since we eliminated that influence," Alenius says. "My kids are happier, and the attitude is gone." Reality of TV viewing

Americans have a love-hate affair with television.

For instance, a recent Time magazine poll found that more than half of the 1,010 people surveyed said there's too much violence, profanity and sex on TV. But most aren't offended by it and don't want it banned.

And despite research showing that TV violence isn't good for our kids, "most parents don't believe that," says Gentile, a psychology professor at Iowa State University.

Though some parents are concerned about TV's influence on their kids, most parents seem unfazed by the disrespectful fare found all over the dial.

Besides, society has changed, Gentile adds. "Kids have always been mean, but we used to be shocked by it," he says. "Now we think it's funny and cute and edgy."

Although Americans claim they want shows such as Leave It To Beaver and The Andy Griffith Show, it's unlikely those shows would succeed today.

"I don't know how you'd make a wholesome situation comedy today," says sociologist Ron Lembo of Amherst College. "What would that be about?"

Did television cause this change? Or are TV writers merely parroting what they see in everyday life?

"People in Hollywood say they're just reflecting society, but I fall into the camp that believes TV normalizes certain behaviors," Caldwell says. "They may take something that exists, but once you put something on TV that's a marginal behavior, then it's seen as acceptable and normal."

Kid programming

As cable television has become widespread, legions of parents feel comfortable letting their kids watch kid-oriented channels such as Cartoon Network, Nickelodeon and the Disney Channel.

But when Carmela Miller noticed that her 8-year-old granddaughter was mimicking teenage attitudes and facial expressions -- scrunching up her eyebrows or cocking her head -- Miller scrutinized the shows that Alexandra Mascolo was watching.

"A lot of the stations that you think are wonderful are not," says Miller, who lives in Winter Park. "They have all these girls talking back, making fun of others, and they have [mean] nicknames for everybody."

Miller now closely monitors some shows, including Disney's That's So Raven and Lizzie McGuire. "They're all teenagers on those shows and, honestly, that's beyond her," says Miller. Alexandra now watches animal shows and Disney Channel's Kim Possible.

Disney shows are by no means the worst, parents say.

"My daughter's into the Disney Channel," says Jacqueline Hunter of Kissimmee of 12-year-old Autumn. It could be much worse, says Hunter, who knows that her daughters' peers are watching racier stuff, including MTV and BET music videos.

But even she has quibbles about her daughter's favorite show, That's So Raven. Although Raven is a good girl, "she's spunky and a little sassy," says Hunter.

As the director of a community center, Hunter is dismayed by the "cockiness" she sees among the preteen and teenage girls.

"Part of it I just chalk up to growing pains. But typically the behaviors that are exhibited on TV show up in kids," Hunter says. "It seems like we parents have lost control because there are so many outside influences."

While some parents dream about throwing out their televisions, Joseph and Lisa Sabourin of Lake County have turned back the clock to the 1960s. Their daughters, Alecia, 9, and Aubrey, 11, don't watch much TV, but when they do, it's usually TV Land -- a retro cable channel that airs shows such as The Andy Griffith Show, The Brady Bunch and Gunsmoke.

The Sabourins also tune in on Sunday nights to watch ABC's feel-good reality show Extreme Makeover: Home Edition.

"And we might go over the edge as a family," says Joseph Sabourin with a laugh, "and sit down and watch Survivor."

We've seen the decline of manners, politeness, and respect over the years. Elders have always been saying that the youth have no respect. Could it be something as simple as the examples we see on TV? We emulate the clothes they wear and cars they drive, one liners and catchphrases, why not their attitudes?