Quote:
Originally Posted by Janey
I think that if you come down on him as well as the school, he's going to feel persecuted and become resentful. If it was me, I would be looking for some sort of understanding, not punishment. I think he already understands what he should not have done, and probably will learn from it going forward. As you said, he is already getting a school sanctioned time-out. Maybe just a quiet conversation with him, no groundings, no revocation of priviledges, but just a conversation about the event. (how would you discuss it withyour hubby, if he got into a shoving match at work?)
I think your son may react more positively if he sees that you are willing to deal with him at a higher level than a young kid.
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HEAVENS! Can you imagine the psychological damage that will befall this poor child if, dare I say it, he is punished for doing something against the rules??? I mean, it's downright
nutty to even suggest that you, as a parent should double what is doubtless an already harsh punishment from the school. Here's a better idea. First of all, tell your son that it's not his fault, that it's that damn other kids fault. Then move on to blaming the teachers and the schools for your sons negative behaviour. Remember! Your son shouldn't feel bad for what he did. This is crucial! Under no circumstances should the boy feel that breaking the rules is unacceptable. Teach him to fight authority. Teach him that rules are meant for breaking. Teach him that there is no hierarchical structure and that teachers and all adults and people in authority are not really to be taken seriously.
Lets get this message out quick before our kids turn into law breaking, disrespectful, rude, obnoxious people!