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Originally Posted by joemc91
I don't really know what to recommend except just pay greater attention to what's going on around you. Mainly to what people do and say about each other because it is indicitive of how they will treat you.
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This is very good advice, woot. Joemc91 knows his stuff.
Try to follow where the laughs are coming from when you meet new people. What motivates the way they interact with others? Are they really listening or are they just waiting until they get to talk again? Are they talking about things that might interest the others or are they talking about the things that interest themselves? Example:
"My car broke down on my way to work today - what a nightmare!"
Person A:"Wow, what happened? How did you get to work?"
Person B:"I hate it when that kind of thing happens - it is such a pain!"
Both are friendly and empathetic, but one is more genuine and focused on the person talking. Sorry, I know it is basic and there are a million variables and you will never know for sure, but the answer is there in the subtleties of a person's behavior and what motivates them. In poker they call signs in a person's physical mannerisms that give away a good hand or a bad hand "tells", learn the tells that give a person away as genuine and loyal.
By the way - these are the "tells" I have learned to look for that have been decent signs for me. No refunds if they don't work for you...
