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Old 04-22-2005, 05:39 PM   #14 (permalink)
maleficent
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Location: Chicago
Quote:
is there any way i can help shore up her emotional fragility that comes with being in not-so-fun classes, and being generally self concious about how she preforms in school?
First the tough love portion of our program:
It's not up to you to shore up her fragility, she's got to find that from within herself. There's a little book, that I've mentioned here more than once, and I seriously need to read it again myself because I have huge problems with self consciousness -- but it's called The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz. It's a wonderful little book that basically is designed to show a person why they should stop putting themself down.

Has she considered that maybe Aerospace Engineering isn't for her? If she's struggling in her first year, it's honestly only going to get worse. The work will get harder and the professors less forgiving, maybe she should sit down iwth her advisor and pick out a program that is better suited to her for now, and when she finds herself, then move back into it. I fear that she'd only be setting herself up to fail.

OK - now the advice you asked for.
She MUST find something that she does for her, that she's good at and makes her feel good. It might be going for a 2 mile run, a good sweaty work out, a club, playing a sport, something that she can look forward to and gives her a boost. Once she finds one thing that she's good at... that little bit of confidence will build and she'll believe that she's good at other things.
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Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.
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