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Originally Posted by ShaniFaye
is there ANYTHING you can do to get thru to a crack addict? I have two that live in my home and they fight constantly...to the point that the cops get called out for domestic disturbances, but they never do anything about it.
I hate living in a Jerry Springer household
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I don't know your situation and based on what you have told me I can offer generaliztaions, I hope will help.
If you are the household then hold an intervention (with friends and family) and demand the addicts either go into rehab or move out and be cut off financially. Tough love interventions can work, they are very difficult, in that you have to maintain an emotionless face and yet talk about emotions.
Those that participate cannot allow themselves to show any emotion at all. The addict will play on every emotion possible and will try to find that "weak link". If emotions are shown, positive or negative the addict knows he/she won. In the interaction always remember the addict has thrived on on, leeched off, and used your emotion for their own self gain. In an intervention, it has to stop, and the beginning of them facing their self has to become reality.
If you show anger, the addict knows anger can be turned into pity or guilt, it is best to have everyone write down exactly what they need to say and not venture off. Rehearse, rehearse, rehearse until you can read that without any emotion, crack in voice, etc.
Tell the addict how much fun life was when they were clean and how much life has become miserable because of their use...... (NOT THEM.... one of the biggest problems with interventions = people give the addict guilt trips and guilt trips just make the addict feel hope is gone or they use it against you.)
If you call Cocaine Anonymous or a treatment center near you (if you want to tell me where you are I can find places that can offer help.... almost every big city has recovery places based on an income sliding scale), they sometimes can refer you to a referee that can come in and help immensely with the intervention.
Now, if they are the household, this is the toughest situation.
You can still hold an intervention, hope they don't throw you out. Chances are they will show you the door and deny totally any problems. They know they can scare you (by taking away your living arrangements) into what they want, which is to use without interference.
The best thing to do if that is the case is to just move out on your own, find a friend or family member that will take you in. As long as you stay in that situation, they will play on every emotion possible from you to get what they want.
Mainly, just remember this, love and positive emotions show that they can fuck up as much as they want and they can keep coming to you to make it right. Anger, hate and negative emotions, just feed their self indulgence because they feel "well she doesn't care, I've fucked up so bad it doesn't matter anymore." Addicts are pros at playing emotions, using everything they can to get justification from others for their use.
Good luck, Shani, you have a hard situation, but with inner strength you can help yourself.... helping them, you can't take that responsibility. You can offer to get them help and be there as they go through it, but in the end they have to want the help for themselves.