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Originally Posted by Starlight4
I feel like I "went backwards". While most people would say that their self-esteem grew since the time of adolescence, I'd have to say that I felt a lot better about myself in high school. Fortunately, I was one of the better liked kids in school, so I never felt pressured into "doing something to look cool." I did things if I wanted to.
I experimented with drugs and underground parties and smoking, but I didn't experiment with sex and alcohol until later. But I think the bottom line is, self-esteem really is all about yourself... I mean, how come some kids are cool if they choose NOT to smoke, while some other kids in the same school or w/e are cool if the choose to smoke??
What I've learned or am trying to learn is that I need to not rely on others to make me feel good about myself... (I know, I sound like an afterschool special on PBS)
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That's just it - as much we ultimately control our level of self-esteem, I think that outside sources factor in as well. Our peers, school, our families, the media... and the peer factor is the most arbitrary and often the most intense when you're in high school. I chose not to smoke and my peers chose to designate non-smokers as "uncool." No amount of self-esteem building exercises in health class could make those "cool" kids give up "cool" for their health or make me feel like any more people liked me.