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I was living with this girl that I was crazy about in college. She was my first very intense sexual relationship. I went home for the summer, and she started sleeping with a guy that was in my circle of friends but not what I would call a close friend. She broke up with me immediately thereafter never telling me about the other guy. I found out later, and it just devastated me. I transferred schools and finished 2 degrees at the other school. That relationship only lasted about a year, but it took me 2 or 3 before I was in shape to date seriously again. Part of this was I was just young and didn't have that much self-confidence in myself.
The main thing is to know it is going to hurt. The best thing is just to let go entirely. Don't talk to her, don't ask about her. It is very difficult, and you will likely slip up at some time. Just focus on yourself and your needs for awhile. Dating someone else probably isn't going to be any good at this time unless you just go into it expecting it to be a brief thing. You might get lucky, but until you have gotten over a bunch of the pain, it is going to be awfully hard to sustain a long-term relationship without being cynical as you mentioned.
Good luck to you. Many of us have been where you have been in the past. I grew because of it and have been successfully married for almost 14 years now.
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