Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post

Cimarron29414 · 03-22-2005, 11:53 AM

JamesB,

I am sorry to hear that this happened. Keep in mind, you have spent your entire adult life with only one person. The feelings you are having are also discomfort because old habits are forcefully being broken. Also, keep in mind that she has spent HER entire adult life with the same person - so, if you think she isn't uncomfortable and thinking about you - think again! However, she CAN'T be a friend to you right now. Just like you can't be a friend to her. All that would do is stir up the old comforts. The only way for her to see her new thing through is to detach from you entirely.

I know that isn't what you want, but it is what you need to hear. If she spoke with you regularly right now, it would be nothing but torture for you. You would NOT be better off. You need to define yourself as a single adult. The last time you were single, you were a child. Start by turning off the TV and the Computer and take up a hobbie outside the house. Dance lessons, a new organization, VOLUNTEERING, something that gives you a new feeling of self-importance and new energy. Good luck man, just don't turn to her for help because it won't help.

03-22-2005, 11:53 AM	#25 (permalink)
Cimarron29414 Still Free Location: comfortably perched at the top of the bell curve!	JamesB, I am sorry to hear that this happened. Keep in mind, you have spent your entire adult life with only one person. The feelings you are having are also discomfort because old habits are forcefully being broken. Also, keep in mind that she has spent HER entire adult life with the same person - so, if you think she isn't uncomfortable and thinking about you - think again! However, she CAN'T be a friend to you right now. Just like you can't be a friend to her. All that would do is stir up the old comforts. The only way for her to see her new thing through is to detach from you entirely. I know that isn't what you want, but it is what you need to hear. If she spoke with you regularly right now, it would be nothing but torture for you. You would NOT be better off. You need to define yourself as a single adult. The last time you were single, you were a child. Start by turning off the TV and the Computer and take up a hobbie outside the house. Dance lessons, a new organization, VOLUNTEERING, something that gives you a new feeling of self-importance and new energy. Good luck man, just don't turn to her for help because it won't help. __________________ Gives a man a halo, does mead. "Here lies The_Jazz: Killed by an ambitious, sparkly, pink butterfly."