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maleficent · 03-17-2005, 04:49 AM

If going to the GYN is painful, most doctors have a smaller speclum that they can use, you just have to tell them.

If fingering yourself is painful, I suspect that the pain is more emotional than physical. This is something that you might want to mention to your doctor.

I'm guessing you've had counseling to deal with the rape, but have you accepted it yourself, that it wasnt your fault, you did nothing to deserve it, and tried to get on with your life.

Some of the pain from fingering might be lack of lubrication. Try a good lube and give it a shot again, and see if it feels differently.

The more relaxed you are, the less painful the experience will be, if you are tense and expecting to be "run thru" with a sword... then you can be darn sure it's gonna hurt. Don't worry so much about the pain, instead think about how the experience, if you are truly ready (and really ask yourself that) will bring you closer to your boyfriend.

03-17-2005, 04:49 AM	#2 (permalink)
maleficent Junkie Moderator Emeritus Location: Chicago	If going to the GYN is painful, most doctors have a smaller speclum that they can use, you just have to tell them. If fingering yourself is painful, I suspect that the pain is more emotional than physical. This is something that you might want to mention to your doctor. I'm guessing you've had counseling to deal with the rape, but have you accepted it yourself, that it wasnt your fault, you did nothing to deserve it, and tried to get on with your life. Some of the pain from fingering might be lack of lubrication. Try a good lube and give it a shot again, and see if it feels differently. The more relaxed you are, the less painful the experience will be, if you are tense and expecting to be "run thru" with a sword... then you can be darn sure it's gonna hurt. Don't worry so much about the pain, instead think about how the experience, if you are truly ready (and really ask yourself that) will bring you closer to your boyfriend. __________________ Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.