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BigBen · 03-11-2005, 12:24 PM

And BTW, my grad degree is an MBA... and I can save you thousands of dollars in tuition and countless hours of studying. Pay close attention:

Managers and business jargon are bullshit. I say that with a 100% confidence interval.

If anyone says any of the following, kick them the fuck out of your office: ( just say, "get out, you fucking fool, BigBen said you'd say something stupid like that")

1. SYNERGY. Easily one of the most overused and least understood words in a business setting

2. RIGHT-SIZING. At least have the integrity to call it what it is, a round of lay-offs

3. HARVARD. That business school has turned itself into Business Mecca with nobody's permission. the theories that are spouted from there have no more (or less) validity than other academic institutions. Publish or Perish, the saying goes. You don't have to have anything valuable to say, as long as someone wants to publish it. Donald Trump says the word HARVARD 5 times an episode. Asshole.

4. OUTSOURCING. Oh, and while I'm giving my company away, why don't you go over to my house and fuck my wife while you're at it?

5. MARKET TIMING. It's either a good idea or it isn't. Why should I wait to buy something I need now? Either I need it or it don't.

6. LEVERAGE. Let's see your degree in Finance. Come on, cough it up. Oh, you don't have one? THEN YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO USE THAT WORD.

Jesus, I hate people that pretend they know what they are talking about. AARRRGH.

Can you tell I am having a bad day at work?

Sorry everyone. I just sat through a 3 hour meeting where the word LEVERAGE was used out of context, and then the VERY NEXT SLIDE looked like the 1000% graffiti massacre up above. I have to vent.

03-11-2005, 12:24 PM	#10 (permalink)
BigBen Comedian Location: Use the search button	And BTW, my grad degree is an MBA... and I can save you thousands of dollars in tuition and countless hours of studying. Pay close attention: Managers and business jargon are bullshit. I say that with a 100% confidence interval. If anyone says any of the following, kick them the fuck out of your office: ( just say, "get out, you fucking fool, BigBen said you'd say something stupid like that") 1. SYNERGY. Easily one of the most overused and least understood words in a business setting 2. RIGHT-SIZING. At least have the integrity to call it what it is, a round of lay-offs 3. HARVARD. That business school has turned itself into Business Mecca with nobody's permission. the theories that are spouted from there have no more (or less) validity than other academic institutions. Publish or Perish, the saying goes. You don't have to have anything valuable to say, as long as someone wants to publish it. Donald Trump says the word HARVARD 5 times an episode. Asshole. 4. OUTSOURCING. Oh, and while I'm giving my company away, why don't you go over to my house and fuck my wife while you're at it? 5. MARKET TIMING. It's either a good idea or it isn't. Why should I wait to buy something I need now? Either I need it or it don't. 6. LEVERAGE. Let's see your degree in Finance. Come on, cough it up. Oh, you don't have one? THEN YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO USE THAT WORD. Jesus, I hate people that pretend they know what they are talking about. AARRRGH. Can you tell I am having a bad day at work? Sorry everyone. I just sat through a 3 hour meeting where the word LEVERAGE was used out of context, and then the VERY NEXT SLIDE looked like the 1000% graffiti massacre up above. I have to vent. __________________ 3.141592654 Hey, if you are impressed with my memorizing pi to 10 digits, you should see the size of my penis.