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if you truly care about this girl, let your friend know. going behind his back isn't an option, considering you're both good friends with him. i've always thought that there was an unsaid rule that you don't date friends' exes without asking. i've just seen it recently - a friend of mine was caught in bed with his friend's ex -girlfriend. albeit, it was only a couple months after they had broken up, the friend was absolutely infuriated. i realize that there's a difference, as in your situation, it's been 4 years since the two had relations, but nonetheless... better to be careful, than to be... well.. friendless, i guess.
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