Ladies! I've been seeing a guy for a little more than 3 months. He's 44 and I'm 36. I've known him for years, had a major crush on him from the day we met (mutual), but I was married at the time, so we just flirted harmlessly until he moved away. We sort of stayed in touch with Xmas and bday cards (it was mostly me sending him the mail.. he said he stayed out of the way) After my separation, we got together for a hike when I found myself in Boston for business. Again, we didn't stay in close contact until once again I found myself in Boston for business last October, over a year since our last get-together. The sparks were still there BIG TIME and we made out. He was really anxious to see me soon after that since I was finally divorced and he drove over two hours to see me every weekend. I told him late Nov that I was falling in love with him and his response was, "Why do you think so? Does anyone ever really know?" Bummer. But we talked and we both admitted we were scared, and well, let's just see where it goes. He's very sweet and affectionate when he's here. He cleans up when I go to work, cooks for me, we have fun. He rarely calls (he's broke, laid off for the winter) but still emails me @2-3 days...short, cheerful, newsy and affectionate. He hasn't come to visit in 3 weeks. Once, I was busy; the next time was my birthday and his car was fucked up and last weekend we had the blizzard. I'm starting to feel like this is smelling a bit like rejection. He sent a happy bday email, but didn't call or anything and ouch that hurt. I don't feel like he's troubled by this separation at all! He hasn't been in a relationship in years and has never been married. Is this guy backing away or is he just stupid in relationships? What should I do? Call him and ask the hard questions? See if he tries to make plans with me and play it cool or just cut and run? This is confusing and painful. I'm pretty vulnerable after only being divorced for a year and a half. Any wisdom?
