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Prince · 12-20-2004, 06:26 AM

Friendship works best with people you don't want to fuck.

With that out of the way, while I sympathize with your situation as I experienced pretty much the same, I can't help but feel that your biggest fuck-up was to let her slip through your fingers.

So it might not have worked out. Most first loves don't. Not seeing what can happen because you're afraid of hurting her is understandable, but often also a weak excuse for being too chicken shit to go for what you want. Perhaps you are too afraid of losing her, of things not working out in the end, so you'd rather live with "what could have been".

You weren't specific to any extent about what those instances were about when you "fucked up". You seemed to do it fairly often...which makes me think that it was either something minor that she blew out of proportion and you took the blame for, OR you threw emotional fits about her past lovers, or her being more experienced than you, or something you cooked up about your concerns and worries. And then again I could be dead wrong, what do I know.

A friendly tip: If a girl/woman wants you to make a decision, and you throw the same ball back at them, they're not going to make their decision based solely on what they want. You exhibited undecisiveness, uncertainty, and lack of faith both in yourself and her, as well as your entirely relationship.

I knew a girl, started online. We'd be on/off, fight a lot because things got so intense and there was the physical distance and whatnot. Sometimes it felt like too much to handle, and that with me she'd only get burned. It was 1 step forward, 2 steps back, all the time. It was heavy...lost my virginity with her, all that good stuff. So eventually she wanted me to make a decision about where we were gonna take things. I was living in Europe, making trips to the States, which is where she was living...we could not go on carrying on things the way they were.

And so I did. We've been married for almost two years. And my balls ain't any bigger than yours.

12-20-2004, 06:26 AM	#14 (permalink)
Prince /nɑndəsˈkrɪpt/ Location: LV-426	Friendship works best with people you don't want to fuck. With that out of the way, while I sympathize with your situation as I experienced pretty much the same, I can't help but feel that your biggest fuck-up was to let her slip through your fingers. So it might not have worked out. Most first loves don't. Not seeing what can happen because you're afraid of hurting her is understandable, but often also a weak excuse for being too chicken shit to go for what you want. Perhaps you are too afraid of losing her, of things not working out in the end, so you'd rather live with "what could have been". You weren't specific to any extent about what those instances were about when you "fucked up". You seemed to do it fairly often...which makes me think that it was either something minor that she blew out of proportion and you took the blame for, OR you threw emotional fits about her past lovers, or her being more experienced than you, or something you cooked up about your concerns and worries. And then again I could be dead wrong, what do I know. A friendly tip: If a girl/woman wants you to make a decision, and you throw the same ball back at them, they're not going to make their decision based solely on what they want. You exhibited undecisiveness, uncertainty, and lack of faith both in yourself and her, as well as your entirely relationship. I knew a girl, started online. We'd be on/off, fight a lot because things got so intense and there was the physical distance and whatnot. Sometimes it felt like too much to handle, and that with me she'd only get burned. It was 1 step forward, 2 steps back, all the time. It was heavy...lost my virginity with her, all that good stuff. So eventually she wanted me to make a decision about where we were gonna take things. I was living in Europe, making trips to the States, which is where she was living...we could not go on carrying on things the way they were. And so I did. We've been married for almost two years. And my balls ain't any bigger than yours. __________________ Who is John Galt?