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I wish I had a magic wand for you, but the best I can manage is that death (which I assume is looming large in your mind) is not the worst thing that can happen. I lost my brother a year & 1/2 ago, and it's been one of the most painful experiences I've gone through, but also the richest and most rewarding. I know that sounds awful, but I've grown so much as a person because of it, and in a lot of ways I feel closer to my brother now than I even did when he was alive.
It sounds like you're doing the right thing - going up to support her, and it's good that your employer is being flexible. Take things as they come, and remember to take care of yourself, too. And don't stuff whatever feelings might come up - the more you repress them, the stronger they'll be when they eventually come out. You're going to be going through a lot of stuff, and you're a human being, and so is everyone else in your family. You're all going to need to give each other a lot of room to just feel what you feel.
And (from one eldest child to another) remember that holding everyone else together doesn't have to be your responsibility. You can choose that if you want, but take it on as a choice and not as an obligation. It'll make all the difference in the world.
Hang in there.
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"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."
- Anatole France
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