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I've learned an important lesson from dating in college...be friends first. All of the relationships I've had where I've been friends with the person before dating have survived. The relationships where we just jumped into dating have not survived or we never made it to friends, which is unfortunate.
One odd circumstance I've faced was a guy I dated, then when he decided to date someone else and have a LTR with her we didn't talk for nearly six months. But then we started chatting again and I was his shoulder to cry on when the other girl broke up with him. Now we're good friends and occasionally more--he falls into the category of friend I would have sex with. Though I adore him, I don't think of him romantically as he and I do not get along well enough to make that work.
So if I meet you you're going to be sorted into several categories over time...it's a bit like a Plinko board (if you're familiar with the Price Is Right)...you have a chance to shift categories over time or shift back. If you drop straight to the bottom of one you're basically stuck. So we could say I divide men into two categories at first: dynamic and static. The dynamic category includes guys I've just met, guys I'm friends with but attracted to, and acquaintances. If you're in the dynamic category, there's something I find attractive about you. The static category includes guys whose girlfriends are my friends, who have dated friends, guys I'm frankly not attracted to, or guys who are skanky hos. From there there are other divisions...and more divisions...it is a very complicated piece of reasoning, but Chris Rock is right about one thing. When I meet a guy, I automatically think a) I'd do him or b) I so totally wouldn't do him, even if he paid me lots and lots of money.
Needless to say I've even confused myself thinking about this issue.
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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau
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