I think the first question we all need to ask is how do we define ourselves. Everyone defines themself differently in relation to society, in relation to others, in relation to the world, etc. We are all very different people, especially around these parts, and thus we have very different criteria for self-definition.
That said, I try not to define myself by any standard set by society, by others, etc. I have established a moral standard for myself, and I try to live up to that standard, and I define who I am via my actions pertaining to that standard. Am I a good person? That's relative to what your idea of good is. I am, according to my standard, a good person, and that is enough for me.
As far as defining myself in terms of the opposite sex, I believe that forces me into a gender role I feel little love for. While I do enjoy typically "feminine" pursuits at times, such as cooking and sewing, I also enjoy "masculine" pursuits such as sports and computers. Thus I find myself without a real gender role, and do not bother to define myself as "feminine" or "masculine".
Furthermore, why do we feel the need to define ourselves? Must we put a label on everything? On every part of ourselves? There are places in my heart and soul that defy labels, and thus I refuse to put any kind of label on myself--be it "feminine", "heterosexual" or otherwise.
As Nietzsche said: "One must have chaos in oneself in order to give birth to a dancing star."
While self-exploration is fine and dandy, let's not be too hasty to label ourselves and compartmentalize every little part of ourselves. Be free.
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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau
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