Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post

onetime2 · 11-21-2004, 02:30 PM

Well, maybe not THE end but it may be more the end than a new beginning. 7 years and 1 day after meeting and 1 day short of 1 year after getting engaged, we are now officially on a "break". I guess it's been a while in coming. We've been through a lot. We've weathered serious health issues (she underwent brain surgery about a year and a half ago), old emotional scars we worked together to heal (mine and her parents' dysfunctional relationships, emotional abuse from her ex-boyfriends and her family, sexual abuse from a stranger and an ex-boyfriend), joblessness, and countless other issues we made it through. In the end I just couldn't handle the lack of support in other areas. Everything (cooking, cleaning, paying bills, taking care of pets, maintaining the house, laundry, etc) fell on to me no matter how many hours I also had to work. I knew we couldn't go on like this. Asked (hell, almost begged) for help with those things for the last 5 years and would get a little effort followed by a return to me taking care of everything.

I love her and she loves me but you just can't have a healthy relationship when one person shoulders 99.9% of the burden. She's now staying with some friends. It will be the first time (other than occasional business trips) in 5+ years that we didn't spend the night in the same bed.

Just had to tell someone about it. Until it's definitely over I don't want to share it with my family or local friends.

11-21-2004, 02:30 PM	#1 (permalink)
onetime2 Junkie Location: NJ	End of a 7 year relationship Well, maybe not THE end but it may be more the end than a new beginning. 7 years and 1 day after meeting and 1 day short of 1 year after getting engaged, we are now officially on a "break". I guess it's been a while in coming. We've been through a lot. We've weathered serious health issues (she underwent brain surgery about a year and a half ago), old emotional scars we worked together to heal (mine and her parents' dysfunctional relationships, emotional abuse from her ex-boyfriends and her family, sexual abuse from a stranger and an ex-boyfriend), joblessness, and countless other issues we made it through. In the end I just couldn't handle the lack of support in other areas. Everything (cooking, cleaning, paying bills, taking care of pets, maintaining the house, laundry, etc) fell on to me no matter how many hours I also had to work. I knew we couldn't go on like this. Asked (hell, almost begged) for help with those things for the last 5 years and would get a little effort followed by a return to me taking care of everything. I love her and she loves me but you just can't have a healthy relationship when one person shoulders 99.9% of the burden. She's now staying with some friends. It will be the first time (other than occasional business trips) in 5+ years that we didn't spend the night in the same bed. Just had to tell someone about it. Until it's definitely over I don't want to share it with my family or local friends. __________________ Strive to be more curious than ignorant.