SlapHappyMalice

Umm...I've typed and retyped this trying to lead up to my problems but to put it simply, I'm 22 years old with no job (never had a full time or part time job in my life), I got no friends, I did Homeschool for the last 4 years of High School because I had low self-esteem and confidence in myself (which was a big mistake to be homeschooled because it just made things worse for me), I spent most of my teen just playing video games and never leaving the house (after I finished schooling I realized that I never really enjoyed games but I was just playing them to hide from my problems), I don't have a driver's license or even know how to drive a car.

I was also born with a hearing loss and tremor in my hands which has made life difficult for me. I have trouble understanding people even when I'm wearing hearing aids and they also have trouble understanding me. I'm so uncertain of myself on whether I heard them correctly or not that I ask them to repeat what they say. I usually avoid sociaizing as much as possible because of the problem and it's tearing me apart. And when the few times people do talk to me I say very little or I just shake my head. Whenever I go out into public places I get nervous and stiff because I'm afraid of someone speaking to me.

My parents aren't happy that I haven't been working but they don't seem to mind either. They never threatened to throw me out or make me pay rent to them but they never encouraged me to try and find a job. My brothers and sister have tried to help me but I wouldn't let them help me. I want to be independent and get a full time job and move out of my parents house. I want to do things such as skiing, surfing, skydiving, bungee jumping, white water rafting, etc. but I'm to afraid to try. I don't know what to do or how to change the way I am. I'm hoping someone will point me in the right direction or just slap me in the face for being afraid of speaking to people.