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It's hard to deal with someone you care about or cared for, intentionally trying to hurt you, but she that is exactly what she is trying to do. The things that she has said to you are just plain mean and wrong.
After being married, she knows how to hit you where it hurts. It’s difficult, but try to play the cool cucumber and don’t let her have the satisfaction of an emotional response. So far you have talked to her about your feelings and she has walked all over them. Try not to ask loaded questions about how she is doing or what she has been doing, as it seems she is using them as an opportunity to strike out at you emotionally.
You sound like a good guy stuck in a bad situation and things will eventually pan out. Take everyone’s advice and talk to an attorney. Right now it sounds as though she has your balls in a vise and it is time you take them back.
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I shake the devil's hand daily... I'd do it hourly, but my hand gets tired.
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