Kyp's Girl

I know exactly how you feel. In fact I came to this sight today because I have the exact same problem and I want it to stop. Me and my husband have been together a little over a year and we fight a lot. I had a very bad past growing up being abused by my mother and I know that I have some of her traits, which I hate. I see myself doing and saying things to my husband that my mother did and said to me. I have tried many different things to try and stop getting mad over the little things but I failed so much that if I make one more mistake my husband will leave me. I have tried everything but I do not want to lose him over this. I love him so much and I hate hurting him but some things I just can't control.

whats worse is now he hurts me back. He has threatend me, hit me, done a lot of yelling, and walk out the front door. Its become a big mess but he still believes in me by saying that if I really care about him and really want to stop acting like I do I will just stop and never do it again. But now its to the point where he has one foot out the door and I just don't want to lose him.

This is what I am going to do. I will keep telling him how much I love him. I will keep telling myself to stop getting mad about the little things. I have to make myself believe that I am strong and can control myself. I never wanted to be like my mother but it happend anyways. I have to keep telling myself that I want to be better than her and be a better person. If I can make a believer out of myself and get more control things will go back to how they should be.