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Echodork · 10-20-2004, 04:30 PM

A new blonde teen pop star will rise to popularity, while another simultaneously fades into obscurity.

Somebody famous will die, and somebody else famous will call them "an inspiration to us all," there will be a huge internet tribute, and two weeks later, we'll all forget both of them exist.

A female solo recording artist will attempt to take a stand on some issue or another, only to be ignored by 98% of the country, including most of her own fans.

The Jehovah's Witnesses will visit me again.

Hollywood will announce yet another movie sequel that has no business being made.

VH1 will produce another Top 100 Somethings of All Time show, and air it three times a day for six months. Alternately, perhaps simultaneously, VH1 will produce another series designed to spew more still-warm nostalgia at my generation.

A child of ludicrously young age will die in a surprising way, and someone will blame Grand Theft Auto for it.

The United States will send troops to a country that, two days prior, 95% of Americans couldn't find on a map in five tries (like France).

A wacky group of individuals will be invited to share a house with no television, no phones, and cameras in every room, and I will be forced to listen to stories of their flirtateous exploits.

The lottery will be won by either 1) someone who is already a millionaire, 2) an old man two days away from heart failure, 3) a complete nutjob, or 4) all of the above.

Some mildly attractive female actress will turn eighteen and for 24 hours the entire world will revolve around her, until she either ruins her career by doing porn or ruins her career by not doing porn.

My wife will play That Fucking Shania Twain Song One More Goddamn Time and I will spend the rest of my life counting my toes in a padded room.

10-20-2004, 04:30 PM	#3 (permalink)
Echodork Tilted	A new blonde teen pop star will rise to popularity, while another simultaneously fades into obscurity. Somebody famous will die, and somebody else famous will call them "an inspiration to us all," there will be a huge internet tribute, and two weeks later, we'll all forget both of them exist. A female solo recording artist will attempt to take a stand on some issue or another, only to be ignored by 98% of the country, including most of her own fans. The Jehovah's Witnesses will visit me again. Hollywood will announce yet another movie sequel that has no business being made. VH1 will produce another Top 100 Somethings of All Time show, and air it three times a day for six months. Alternately, perhaps simultaneously, VH1 will produce another series designed to spew more still-warm nostalgia at my generation. A child of ludicrously young age will die in a surprising way, and someone will blame Grand Theft Auto for it. The United States will send troops to a country that, two days prior, 95% of Americans couldn't find on a map in five tries (like France). A wacky group of individuals will be invited to share a house with no television, no phones, and cameras in every room, and I will be forced to listen to stories of their flirtateous exploits. The lottery will be won by either 1) someone who is already a millionaire, 2) an old man two days away from heart failure, 3) a complete nutjob, or 4) all of the above. Some mildly attractive female actress will turn eighteen and for 24 hours the entire world will revolve around her, until she either ruins her career by doing porn or ruins her career by not doing porn. My wife will play That Fucking Shania Twain Song One More Goddamn Time and I will spend the rest of my life counting my toes in a padded room. Last edited by Echodork; 10-20-2004 at 04:33 PM..