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I agree with ustwo. It is ok to care about these kids--that's part of your role as teacher--but you have to set the boundaries for yourself also. I think part of the reason you are so conflicted is because you have some social/moral conflicts right now. How much should you care about the kids? When does caring become too detached, and defragmented? Isn't defragmentation what's happening to our society? I know you don't want to model that.
Ustwo talks about doctors, and I think doctors can be highly detached from their patients, but I guess that's one of the things they're taught to do. If you've seen "Patch Adams" (which I know is only a movie, but I think it was based on a true story), he does the opposite and is remarkable. Do you want to be remarkable? What do you expect from the kids, but I think more importantly, what do you expect from yourself?
I think that thinking about these issues and admitting them is a good first step. You can't change the world, but you can enrich peoples lives. Simply doing your job as a teacher helps. I've always looked back and admired my teachers. The role of education should always be to teach children pertinent things that they need to succeed in life, and become a role model. Now we get into the definitions of "success". For at-risk kids with unfortunate backgrounds, that might be getting them through the program and graduating. That's all you can hope for. If you want to reach out to these kids, connect with them. But don't let that interfere with your single, most important job, as teacher. Find issues to talk about that directly affects their lives, and tell them how it does. Maybe then they can see and become a little more animated in discussions.
Hope this helps. Use this thread as a sort of introspection for you, if you don't get it anywhere else.
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And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
~Anais Nin
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