almostaugust

Every aussie has a Huntsman story or two. Personally, i am reduced to a pathetic screaming fucker every time i come in to contact with these spiders. Here is my latest story.

I was driving back from the boxing at panthers last week. It was pouring outside, and the lights from the other traffic was the only thing illuminating the inside of my car. Suddenly i saw this massive hand sized Huntsman creep slowly accross my dash board. I panic. I call my girlfriend and tell her that im in strife. "Can you see it?" she asks. "Yeah its stopped and looking at me" i tell her. "IIf you make it home, ill run out and kill it" she tells me.
So i slowly tried to make my way home with this fucker perched right on top of my dash just looking at me. Now, as i get near my driveway it starts TO WALK RIGHT AT ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It pauses right on the edge of the dashboard. I can see it clearly in the streetlight. It is massive and only centimetres from my hand clutching the steering wheel.
So i reach down grab my club lock, never taking my eyes of the beast. DIEEEEEEEEE! I scream as try to club it to death. I miss it, but only got one of its legs. I am vaguely aware of it chucking a monumental hissy fit, as spiders do when attacked. I scream out like the fat kid from The Goonies. My Corolla is small and cramped. I open the door and run out in the rain jumping around with my knees in the air. My girlfriend marches toward the car, torch in hand, locates the beast and kills it easily. I am a blubbering fool at this point, and sheepishly make my way towards the house.