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Mostly, I run the reds.
But seriously, how can you concentrate on the good things, when it's the bad things that bother you? Of course a fly on the wall is gonna bother me: the whole point is that the wall has to be perfect. The fly spoils it. It's the same with life.
There's too many things that didn't happen to me today: how can I be happy about that? I don't have a tooth ache. I didn't get raped. I don't have cancer. My car didn't break down? It's impossible to concentrate on the "good" things, it's too much. You only worry about the things that break your perfect pattern, your perfection, or your perception of that.
The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. As are the lights....
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I want no escape.
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