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Dude, MOST women cannot climax from sex alone. Moreso, only the most talanted of them can enjoy sex at all with some guy trying to force the issue. So, relax, communicate with her. In fact, compleltely drop the orgasm issue. You don't want to ruin her experience of sex by trying to reach a a goal of satisfying your ego.
Dude, forgive me if that sounds harsh, but I was an asshole about this issue when I was younger, and it took me forever to unfuck myself! I'm just trying to save you a lotta time and heartbreak!
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The sad thing is... as you get older you come to realize that you don't so much pilot your life, as you just try to hold on, in a screaming, defiant ball of white-knuckle anxious fury 
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