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I used to say....
that myself, that I was too strong, and I'd never let anyone abuse me. And if it had started with obvious, blatant abuse, I'd probably have been able to stick with it. But when it starts subtly, with scathing looks when you say something he/she disagrees with, a finger in your chest when you're fighting.... and it escalates slowly, sometimes you find yourself taking shit you'd NEVER take right out from the start. And by the time it IS abuse, there are emotions involved, common property, possibly children.... maybe you have stopped working, and he's alienated you from your friends and family, and even though you're suffering abuse, it's not ALL the time, and when it's good, it's really, really good.... And the alternative is to leave and start over, in the unknown, and sometimes that's more frightening than living with his abuse.
And if you're like me, who lives an alternative lifestyle, sometimes it's hard to explain that some of it IS abuse and some of it ISN'T... There are always reasons why women.... and men, for that matter... who find themselves in an abusive relationship don't leave. Now that I am OUT of the abusive relationships, I know what to look for and I'm wary and cautious. I feel fortunate to have found a man who is kind and considerate, and most definitely NOT abusive. *grins*
Bryn
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“When facism comes to America it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.”
~Sinclair Lewis
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