Okay, so I'm finally ready to do this... to write about this faithfull vacation. But before you read on... be warned, not all ends well...
Also, there certain parts were left out as I don't have any problem telling them, but they involve two people...
So she comes and the whole meeting is such an anti-climax. Like I do this every day (just for the record, I don't). Anyway, we go to the hotel, unload our bags and go into Amsterdam. I am nervous as hell and appearantly so is another part of me, because... well... I know know the full meaning of blue balls. I guess it's probably a manifestation of the anxiety or whatever.
We had agreed to meet as friends, but that first day, we kissed and held eachother and halfway through the day we headed back to the hotel as she was tired (and so was I) and we slept in eachothers arms for a while. Woke up to get some dinner in a floating chinese restaurant and went back to the hotel to sleep some more.
Next day we go to the hotel in Vlissingen... my friend picks us up (in a suit), and as he works in the hotel where we are staying, he managed to get us a room with a seaside view. You open the windows and you can hear the sea... very romantic.
That night, I take her barhopping with another good friend of mine, very nice, especially as she gets to drink alcohol while 'only' being 20.
We get back to the hotel late that night, but not after we spent a while on a bench on the beaulevard in front of the hotel, looking at the sea and holding eachother.
Back in the room we discover that my friend at the hotel had gotten us a HUGE fruitbasket and a couple of beers and some bottled water.
After that... well... I am not sure how much she would want me to tell, so I'll talk about me... though that was pretty embarassing... See I had had a lot of beer, not too much to be drunk, but ummm... well... you get the drift, we tried but didn't get far
Next day, we slept late and walked around the city for a while... she called back home and well... we talked and held hands 'n stuff...
That night we ate at my parents, so she got to meet them and we went out with the friend from the hotel and some more friends... although she got tired around 11 pm and we left... also, by this time it was clear that she had gotten a cold from some guy in the plane. But back at the hotel she took some stuff against it and suddenly she was 'feeling a lot better' and she proceded to jump my bones. But again I had had some of the accursed beer and well... we had to resort to other means of jumping eachothers bones.
Next morning is when the shit hit the fan though...
We woke up late and had a lunch with the friends from last night. We walked along the beech and she told me that she wanted to go home. The first couple of times I took it as a joke... I mean, we were having a great vacation (or so I thought). But appearantly she really wanted to go home...
I was heartbroken and well... I hadn't gotten enough sleep, plus I saw something more in her eyes... and I... well... I cried... and eventually she called her mom who told her to stick it out for a while longer (same thing I said) and so she did.
We went to my parents again for dinner and prepared to go to Paris. Again I got little sleep that night...
Next day we headed to Paris, we got there and had dinner in a Pizza Hut at which we ordered in english :P simply because we were both too tired to deal with trying to order something in French.
When we got back, we got some genuine sleep, but not before I had to try to persuade her to stay again...
Next day... I feel a lot better... I go out and get some cards for the metro and a phone card and we went to see the Eiffeltower and some other monument that is right across from it... at the other monument she told me again that she wanted to go home...
We head back to the hotel and she calls home again... says that she doesn't want to leave the hotel any more.
I told her, that I am not goanna stay in the hotel cause I want to see something when we're in Paris plus I want to get some food. She tells me that's fine, would I bring her something if I remember.
So I go see the Arc de Triomph and walk along the Champs de Lysee... none of which I am enjoying... so I head back, find a place with take-away and bring it back... that night we decide that she goes home tomorrow, and so do I.
That night, no beer, not sleepy... finally it kindof goes alright... the last night though...
Next day, she gets a ticket back home I take her to Charles de Gaule (international airport in France) and go back in a shuttle-bus, with my glasses on to conceal the tears that are falling down and the redness of my eyes. Because I know it's over. I saw it in her eyes... her and me... she doesn't feel for me what I feel for her.
I go back, and blow up at a stupid French guy at the hotel front desk when he refuses to speak english but seems to need to know why I want to check out while I have 4 days left and everything is payed for already. I arrange a ticket back home and get a pack of smokes... I had quit a year ago, but between throwing myself in the Seine or huddling up in a corner in the hotel and crying for 4 days or a pack, I chose nicotine. I get home around midnight after which I give the pack to my sis. No need to start the addiction over again over a girl.
Next day I find out through her online journal (which she thought she could hide from me) that she and a friend of hers were more than just friends... which explains her wearing his necklace (explains him giving her a necklace in the first place) instead of mine. And that she had felt she'd 'outgrown' me. Miss home-sick... outgrown
me...
We're still friends though, but she did say that she didn't feel for me what I feel for her.
I took what was left of the (already paid for) trip with a good friend and had an okay time... Except for the fact that I am now heartbroken and feel like crying and dying.
Maybe some people were just losers who were meant to be alone huh?
Also, because you are such good people, and you've gotten this far in reading this:
the galleries with the vacation pictures.
I don't know if I can keep them up though... I have to pay for my bandwith so I'm afraid if the traffic gets too high I'll have to take them down...