Ayee, I cannot believe this. I wrote a bazillion-word post and lost it all
Anyway, I'm rooting for you dalnet, so I'm gonna write it again.
*Golf clap, golf clap* Seaver is 110% correct.
In my first week at university I was sitting in a lecture, and I didn't know anyone. A paper was handed out and I happened to have two copies of it. A girl walked in about 15 minutes late, I took note of where she sat, and snuck over to her and gave her my extra copy. At the end of the lecture as we all filed out she came up to me and thanked me for the paper. We chatted as we went to our next classes, she gave me her phone number, and the next thing you know I dated her for almost a year.
Now, how great would it be if you were sitting, having a coffee, and a girl walked up and introduced herself? Would you think 'Weirdo...', or would you be flattered? And if you were with your friends, just chilling out, and a girl came up and introduced herself, would you think 'Weirdo... I'm hanging with my friends, don't interrupt me', or would you be both flattered and happy that she had the guts?
My point is that everyone likes to have someone make the first move. Even if the girl who comes up to you isn't really your type, wouldn't the main feeling be a good one? Wouldn't that be a nice boost of confidence? And if she is your type, then you're in.
It seems to me that you're a pretty straight-edge guy. Perhaps in high school that was 'uncool', but mate, in college or in university, that's the time to throw all of that out the window. If you thought you didn't fit in, or felt lonely back then, this is the time to throw all of that out and start a clean slate. Straight-edge people weren't cool in my high school, but at university there are millions of them. Alliances, judgement, sticking to only one social group... that's the stuff you want to avoid in college, especially at the start.
As for meeting girls, whether for friendships or relationships, just a few thoughts off the top of my head:
- Find a coffee shop or a bar, and make it your regular place. You'll notice the girls who are regulars there, too, and that's a way to start up a conversation. "Hi, I've seen you here a lot, do you study nearby? Me too, I'm in the dorms! I study journalism, how about you? Really? I've got a few friends who do that actually. Do you want to grab a coffee and sit outside?" It sounds totally lame here, but it's a conversation starter.
- In 'your' coffee shop, or in a busy park, read a book. If you like science fiction and you see a girl sitting on the grass with your favorite sci-fi book next to her, can you see the conversation starter there? "Hi, what part are you up to? Ah, you're still early on, it's gets really good soon. Don't worry, I won't spoil it, but my favorite part is really soon." All of that, and a friendly smile (as long as you don't interrupt her when she's actually reading!), will either get you into a great big long coversation with this girl, or a few yes or no responses. If that's the case, wish her well with the book, and leave it at that. It's not 'She's missing out, it's her loss', it's just that it wasn't going to happen with that girl. Don't go from girl-to-girl at the coffee shop, but don't let one disappointment discourage you.
- Definitely join a few clubs or societies. That's where people with the same interests congregate, right? And I'm sure at the start of the year they'll have lots of 'getting-to-know-each-other'-type activities, because you'll all be in the same boat, not knowing anyone.
I think I've rambled on enough, but basically, don't let the bastards get you down! Just keep at it!