My mother once told me that its takes half as long as the relationship to heal from it. By that you still have a year and half to go. ouch. 
I am going through the same thing and the one thing I did find helpfull that has been said here alot it to write. Write your thoughts your feelings and what you would/should/could say. I don't think you should send them. As the conciquences can and may not be what you want.
What do you hope to gain if you could say what to him? Is it worth hurting the guy you are with? If he is, let the one you are with go as you going to end up hurting him more in the end.
Trust me on that.
__________________
"Computer games don't affect kids; I mean if Pac-Man
affected us as kids,we'd all be running around in
darkened rooms, munching magic pills and listening
to repetitive electronic music."
-Kristian Wilson, Nintendo, Inc, 1989
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