Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - How do you help people who won't help themselves?

maleficent · 06-02-2004, 05:40 PM

Rescuing her won't help unless she wants to get rescued. Most abused victims end up going back to their abusers unless they really want help.

She may not think she's got options. Help her to see them. Do some research for battered women's shelters. They have people on staff who are trained to help. If she's in Louisiana, have her go talk to one of my best friends who runs a battered women's shelter.

Everyone telling her to leave isn't going to help her. Right now her self esteem is very damaged. She doesn't think she's got choices. It's common among victims. She doesn't think she deserves any better than him. She does.

What interests her? She needs something in her life besides him. Be thankful she still has you, and that you know this information.

She has to want to leave, she won't want to leave unless she has a place to go. The women's shelters can help with that, some of them are really nice places. They have counselors who can help her find herself again.

Bless you and good luck.

06-02-2004, 05:40 PM	#2 (permalink)
maleficent Junkie Moderator Emeritus Location: Chicago	Rescuing her won't help unless she wants to get rescued. Most abused victims end up going back to their abusers unless they really want help. She may not think she's got options. Help her to see them. Do some research for battered women's shelters. They have people on staff who are trained to help. If she's in Louisiana, have her go talk to one of my best friends who runs a battered women's shelter. Everyone telling her to leave isn't going to help her. Right now her self esteem is very damaged. She doesn't think she's got choices. It's common among victims. She doesn't think she deserves any better than him. She does. What interests her? She needs something in her life besides him. Be thankful she still has you, and that you know this information. She has to want to leave, she won't want to leave unless she has a place to go. The women's shelters can help with that, some of them are really nice places. They have counselors who can help her find herself again. Bless you and good luck. __________________ Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.