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Sounds like a lot of her own orgasms from masturbation come from her imagination, and her mind. Each person is responsible for their own orgasms -- it's no reflection of you that she can't with you. Would you prefere she faked? (You probably wouldn't know)
If her imagination is that fertile, work with that, read erotic stories to her, role play, fantasy stuff, that would involve her mind. Or just sit back and enjoy the show.
TALK TO HER though, ask her what she wants, what she needs - -if you are "negotiating" anal sex, doesn't sound a whole lot like you are really listening to her.
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Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.
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