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I think the other side of men not using toys is tied to our egos. Of course what isn't tied to our egos. When I masturbate I experiment. I think generally men do not like to be exploritative in their sexuality, unless it is defiling some woman =). Do what pleases you most...
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You keep searching, but what you're looking for is inside.
Forget about who you thought you were, and accept who you are.
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