Quote:
Originally posted by motdakasha
there is a difference between chivalry and courtesy. the underlying message behind chivalry is that a woman is supposed to be weak and helpless; it is the man's duty to protect a woman because she is a frail creature. this is why chivalry annoys me. men think it is good and courteous to be chivalrous, but i disagree. i can open the door on my own if my hands are free. i'm not weak. i'm not frail. i can lift heavy objects, too. i am a perfectly capable woman and chivalrous actions are meant to show the opposite. you can be courteous and good without being chivalrous. courtesy is when you aid someone when it's beneficial toward them, not because you think they are weak and therefore need to be helped at all times. (a definition from m-w: consideration, cooperation, and generosity in providing [as a gift or privilege])
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Actually Chivalry isnt about treating woman as weak it is all about trying to "win" her. The code of chivalry was founded in the middle ages in response to fin amour. Fin amour is the concept of romantic love. Before this marraige was a financial contract. During this period romantic love started becoming the basis for selecting a marraige partner. As a consequence men had to prove their love. The code which defined such acts is the code of chivalry. Throughout human history woman have decided when sex is initiated. Men pursue consistently but sex will usually occur only when the woman has changed her answer from "no" to "yes". This is an incredible amount of poweer for woman to have. Men have learnt that they have to coerce/seduce/prove their love in order to get that answer of "yes". How do they do this? They do nice things, such as opening doors, for someone they care about. It is not men treating you as if your weak but then treating you as a very special woman. And you get angry at them for it? Perhaps you could show a little empathy next time some guy does something nice for you and accept it graciously?