Golf club evolves into weapon. - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Phaenx · 05-22-2003, 04:21 PM

I was rifling through my golf bag today hosing around with the clubs on the patio and noticed I, for whatever reason, own two 6 irons. Upon realising this I decide to take the other out to relieve some of the weight while carrying the bag around a golfcourse.

What do I do with an extra club? Well I thought maybe I should put it in the basement and let it sit around until it's even more ancient then it already is, I could try to sell it, but noone would probably want it, or I could set it next to my bed in case some night I hear a noise and discover some ass breaking into my house. I thought this was a good idea if in case I had to defend myself from said burglar, then I thought to myself what other clubs would do more damage then this 6 iron?

After some thought, I think an iron would certainly tear someones skull up more then a driver would. It has less surface area and the same if not more weight to deliver force with, resulting in a good whack to the noggin. I think this, along with my knife, sitting next to my bed gives me a fairly good chance if someone were stupid enough to try and rob me without a gun.

This brings up another thought, and my question; Do you sleep with a weapon nearby? If so, what is it and why do you have it there, or if not how come you don't have one there?

Leander · 05-22-2003, 05:12 PM

I have found that I am usually more accurate with my shorter irons and wedges. I would probably go with my sand wedge as a weapon. The weighting on the sole and the degree of loft would be dandy for a little intruder skull splitting.
I don't keep a weapon by the bed, I keep one in the bed. You do not wake up my wife. Saddam Hussein is/was a campfire girl in comparison.

Tirian · 05-26-2003, 08:01 AM

I know a guy who had his skull cracked with an iron in a brawl. The extra 6 iron should work quite nicely.

mfe · 05-28-2003, 05:48 PM

The Cheat can certainly do some damage with a golf club.

Hard8s · 05-30-2003, 02:11 PM

As long as I aim way left of the guy I could probably hit him. Got to cure that nasty Slice!

SACKINGSFAN · 05-30-2003, 02:49 PM

I hit a guy in the jaw once with a wood and broke his jaw. I didn't mean to he was just standing behind me when i took the club back

Lebell · 05-30-2003, 03:09 PM

Used by Navy Seals and the Secret Service:

The problem with a club or long gun is manuverability. You have to be in the open to effectively use it.

Craven Morehead · 05-30-2003, 08:14 PM

"Do you sleep with a weapon nearby?"

Just my wife.

holtmate · 05-30-2003, 09:48 PM

Fore!!
*thwack*
Those irons can sure do some damage...but you do need a bit more room.

Atomic Pinkie · 06-02-2003, 03:52 AM

i would suggest something small yet powerful that is easy to use when panicking

Stun gun is a no no

Stun baton, yes, you don't have to be as close

Phaenx · 06-04-2003, 11:36 PM

Ironically, I was looking through a magazine just now that sells a lot of those billy clubs and stun baton type stuff for like 10 bucks a pop. They also sell confederate flag dew rags.

05-22-2003, 04:21 PM	#1 (permalink)
Phaenx The Northern Ward Location: Columbus, Ohio	Golf club evolves into weapon. I was rifling through my golf bag today hosing around with the clubs on the patio and noticed I, for whatever reason, own two 6 irons. Upon realising this I decide to take the other out to relieve some of the weight while carrying the bag around a golfcourse. What do I do with an extra club? Well I thought maybe I should put it in the basement and let it sit around until it's even more ancient then it already is, I could try to sell it, but noone would probably want it, or I could set it next to my bed in case some night I hear a noise and discover some ass breaking into my house. I thought this was a good idea if in case I had to defend myself from said burglar, then I thought to myself what other clubs would do more damage then this 6 iron? After some thought, I think an iron would certainly tear someones skull up more then a driver would. It has less surface area and the same if not more weight to deliver force with, resulting in a good whack to the noggin. I think this, along with my knife, sitting next to my bed gives me a fairly good chance if someone were stupid enough to try and rob me without a gun. This brings up another thought, and my question; Do you sleep with a weapon nearby? If so, what is it and why do you have it there, or if not how come you don't have one there? __________________ "I went shopping last night at like 1am. The place was empty and this old woman just making polite conversation said to me, 'where is everyone??' I replied, 'In bed, same place you and I should be!' Took me ten minutes to figure out why she gave me a dirty look." --Some guy

05-22-2003, 05:12 PM	#2 (permalink)
Leander Crazy Location: The Land o'Toxins and Wudder	I have found that I am usually more accurate with my shorter irons and wedges. I would probably go with my sand wedge as a weapon. The weighting on the sole and the degree of loft would be dandy for a little intruder skull splitting. I don't keep a weapon by the bed, I keep one in the bed. You do not wake up my wife. Saddam Hussein is/was a campfire girl in comparison. __________________ Just me and God, watching Scotty die..

05-30-2003, 02:11 PM	#5 (permalink)
Hard8s Addict Location: Wherever I am!	As long as I aim way left of the guy I could probably hit him. Got to cure that nasty Slice! __________________ If ignorance is bliss, then wipe this smile off my face!

05-30-2003, 02:49 PM	#6 (permalink)
SACKINGSFAN Tilted Location: Stockton ca	I hit a guy in the jaw once with a wood and broke his jaw. I didn't mean to he was just standing behind me when i took the club back __________________ I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours

05-30-2003, 03:09 PM	#7 (permalink)
Lebell Cracking the Whip Location: Sexymama's arms...	Used by Navy Seals and the Secret Service: The problem with a club or long gun is manuverability. You have to be in the open to effectively use it. __________________ "Of all tyrannies, a tyranny exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end, for they do so with the approval of their own conscience." – C. S. Lewis The ONLY sponsors we have are YOU! Please Donate!

05-26-2003, 08:01 AM	#3 (permalink)
Tirian Addict Location: Canada	I know a guy who had his skull cracked with an iron in a brawl. The extra 6 iron should work quite nicely.

05-28-2003, 05:48 PM	#4 (permalink)
mfe Crazy	The Cheat can certainly do some damage with a golf club.

05-30-2003, 08:14 PM	#8 (permalink)
Craven Morehead Custom User Title	"Do you sleep with a weapon nearby?" Just my wife.

05-30-2003, 09:48 PM	#9 (permalink)
holtmate Flailing White Boy Location: Cincinnati	Fore!! thwack Those irons can sure do some damage...but you do need a bit more room. __________________ "Give her your coat" "Why me?" "Because you're perfect." "You have a point there."

06-02-2003, 03:52 AM	#10 (permalink)
Atomic Pinkie Addict Location: Chicago	i would suggest something small yet powerful that is easy to use when panicking Stun gun is a no no Stun baton, yes, you don't have to be as close __________________ Where dem bitches at?

06-04-2003, 11:36 PM	#11 (permalink)
Phaenx The Northern Ward Location: Columbus, Ohio	Ironically, I was looking through a magazine just now that sells a lot of those billy clubs and stun baton type stuff for like 10 bucks a pop. They also sell confederate flag dew rags. __________________ "I went shopping last night at like 1am. The place was empty and this old woman just making polite conversation said to me, 'where is everyone??' I replied, 'In bed, same place you and I should be!' Took me ten minutes to figure out why she gave me a dirty look." --Some guy