Confrontation - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Rogue · 10-11-2005, 05:56 AM

Do you think cornering a guy is "forward", or unlady like. What do guys really want? Are they really looking for the out spoken forward chick, or the quiet, shy type?

Mr Honest · 10-11-2005, 06:19 AM

I would never corner a lady I didn't know and was attracted to, it's too aggressive and unpleasant. I would not expect someone to act this way to me. No one ever has.
You should alway be able to attract someone with a smile, a look, your words.

I don't mind outspoken women or shy ones. Drunk or loud people in general I find a complete turn off.

Glory's Sun · 10-11-2005, 06:45 AM

personally, I like a girl that can stand up for herself. Tell me to fuck off, or argue with me because she's right. Sure there's a limit to it. A girl who's just shy and doesn't argue or stand up for what she thinks is right is boring to me.

Depending on what the guy was cornered for.. depends on if it was right or not

Jinn · 10-11-2005, 07:32 AM

As with EVERYTHING else in life, balance --

A boorish troll screaming at me and cornering me isn't attractive, nor is a meek little mouse that will let me walk all over them...

If I were designing the "girlfriend application" it would definitely require that the applicant be able to rationally defend her ideals, while simultaneously being able to accept and support anothers. In reality, this is how everyone should act, not just 'girlfriend material.' If people were both more assertive and more understanding, the world be an entirely different place.

I've liked shy girls, but they became boring when I realized they were shy becuase they didn't have anything to actually SAY. They had nothing the felt passionately about, so why should I be any different? Likewise, I've been attracted to the outgoing girls who take charge, but it eventually becomes tiresome being dragged around by her powerful edicts.

It's all in being able to balance - accept and direct.

777 · 10-11-2005, 02:29 PM

Well, the idea of what a Lady is these days tends to change from time to time. It might depend on how forward one is. For some guys, they'll take the slutty chick home, and take the lady home to meet mom.

rsl12 · 10-11-2005, 02:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rogue

Do you think cornering a guy is "forward", or unlady like. What do guys really want? Are they really looking for the out spoken forward chick, or the quiet, shy type?

I hope you're not asking because you want to try something with a guy. The trick is to be yourself! If you try to be outspoken when you're really shy, the truth will come out eventually. And vice versa.

GoldenOuroboros · 10-11-2005, 04:44 PM

Don't corner him in an aggressive sense, if he's avoiding you and you like him, simply ask him out. Be prepared for him saying something that you may not like, but then he may like this approach from you.

Personally being abit shy myself I always waited for the girl to make the first move, some do this and some don't. I like it when they do. Being outspoken doesn't mean that a lady isn't a lady

I say go ahead!

Just be prepared... and do inform us of what happens.

hrandani · 10-11-2005, 04:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rogue

Do you think cornering a guy is "forward", or unlady like. What do guys really want? Are they really looking for the out spoken forward chick, or the quiet, shy type?

Back to your original question. There's nothing wrong with being forward. Some guys find it very refreshing. Me, for example.

Others would prefer a more demure, graceful girl.

But as someone has already stated, it is more important to be yourself.

Rogue · 10-12-2005, 12:26 AM

Quote:

But as someone has already stated, it is more important to be yourself.

What if being yourself doesn't count anymore? I know its important, and that you not to change for anyone. How far would one go to be with the person you want???

mandy · 10-12-2005, 12:31 AM

there is a limit to how far one can go...but, the best way is just to be honest because it's going to come out in the end if it already hasnt...and...being yoruself always counts.if he doesnt like you for "the real you" then he isnt worth your time.

Uncle Pony · 10-12-2005, 12:41 AM

As long as you're not a brash, drunken whore I don't see a problem with it. Taking him to the side to talk is OK. Cornering him, grabbing his genitals and making lewd comments after he's asked you to leave him alone is not OK. I hate that! I'm not a piece of meat, damn it! I have feelings too!

Um, yeah. Anyway, it depends on what you do and what you say once he's cornered.

Cynthetiq · 10-12-2005, 01:00 AM

assertive is attractive... boorishly demanding or passive aggressive managing your way is not.

rsl12 · 10-12-2005, 05:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rogue

What if being yourself doesn't count anymore?

Do you have a hideous personality? If that's the case, I don't know what advice to offer.

EDIT: Sorry that's so harsh, I didn't mean it to be. But what a thing to say, "what if being yourself doesn't count anymore?" Are you ok? Did something happen? Is the situation that desparate?

Redlemon · 10-12-2005, 06:07 AM

Rogue, please tell us about the guy you are interested in, a little about yourself, and if he would have any clue that you like him. Concrete examples are always easier to work with.

(I gotta stop ending my sentences in prepositions.)

Glory's Sun · 10-12-2005, 06:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rogue

What if being yourself doesn't count anymore? I know its important, and that you not to change for anyone. How far would one go to be with the person you want???

I don't go far. I am who I am..what you see is what you get. Yeah it's cliche but you know what, it's the fucking truth. If someone can't like you for who you are and the silly little things that are annoying, then, it's time to find someone else. Sure there can be compromise, but if you compromise who you are at the very core.. then it's destined to be an unhappy relationship.

joeyaz · 10-12-2005, 08:34 PM

I guess a bit of both .99% of the girls I've met have been the forward type they have approached me or I had some alcohol induced bravery.

In school and even at work I've had crushes on the shy quiet type but never had what it takes to approach them I'm not sure why..and only with women who I'm attracted to..other women and people in general I'm really outgoing etc..but someone attractive and I clam up unless they make the first move. I really need to work on that!

Rogue · 10-12-2005, 10:29 PM

Quote:

Rogue, please tell us about the guy you are interested in, a little about yourself, and if he would have any clue that you like him. Concrete examples are always easier to work with.

Well i think of myself as a shy person, but everone i know thinks different. I tend to put on this "mask" when in company, as to not let let people know that i'm shy. I'm shy in the sense of i can never make the first move when it comes to guys, though i do flirt with them. The guys i've been with or attracted to all turned out to be the same,"jerks",maybe i'm just one of those silly girls who fall for the sweet talk.At the same time put going and when i party, i party hard.

His four years younger than i am.He does not smoke or drink or go to clubs.He doesn't even like to chill with us when we party.His really into church.I respect all his choice not to indulge in anything. We still have nice chats and all, and i realy like him.he would say things that would make me think that he is interested, but is he really, or is he just being a friends.I never know unless i ask,and that i'm not doing.

healer · 10-13-2005, 01:03 AM

I'm a firm believer in going after what you want. If you don't ask, you'll never know. Try and be as open and honest with him about your feelings towards him as possible. Who knows, maybe he really digs you but, like you, is too scared to make the first move.

Go get him tiger

777 · 10-14-2005, 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rogue

What if being yourself doesn't count anymore? I know its important, and that you not to change for anyone. How far would one go to be with the person you want???

I heard this at the office some time back.

Being who you are, has got you to where you are today. If you want to change where you are going, then you'll have to change who you are to get there.

Now if you want to stop being the type of gal who falls for sweet talk and start going out with a nice, decent guy, then that's great. I was never much of a sweet talker anyway

10-11-2005, 05:56 AM	#1 (permalink)
Rogue Upright	Confrontation Do you think cornering a guy is "forward", or unlady like. What do guys really want? Are they really looking for the out spoken forward chick, or the quiet, shy type? Last edited by Rogue; 10-11-2005 at 05:59 AM.. Reason: repetition

10-11-2005, 06:19 AM	#2 (permalink)
Mr Honest Crazy	I would never corner a lady I didn't know and was attracted to, it's too aggressive and unpleasant. I would not expect someone to act this way to me. No one ever has. You should alway be able to attract someone with a smile, a look, your words. I don't mind outspoken women or shy ones. Drunk or loud people in general I find a complete turn off. __________________ Human beings : who could ever claim to like them all?

10-11-2005, 07:32 AM	#4 (permalink)
Jinn Lover - Protector - Teacher Location: Seattle, WA	As with EVERYTHING else in life, balance -- A boorish troll screaming at me and cornering me isn't attractive, nor is a meek little mouse that will let me walk all over them... If I were designing the "girlfriend application" it would definitely require that the applicant be able to rationally defend her ideals, while simultaneously being able to accept and support anothers. In reality, this is how everyone should act, not just 'girlfriend material.' If people were both more assertive and more understanding, the world be an entirely different place. I've liked shy girls, but they became boring when I realized they were shy becuase they didn't have anything to actually SAY. They had nothing the felt passionately about, so why should I be any different? Likewise, I've been attracted to the outgoing girls who take charge, but it eventually becomes tiresome being dragged around by her powerful edicts. It's all in being able to balance - *accept and* direct**. __________________ "I'm typing on a computer of science, which is being sent by science wires to a little science server where you can access it. I'm not typing on a computer of philosophy or religion or whatever other thing you think can be used to understand the universe because they're a poor substitute in the role of understanding the universe which exists independent from ourselves." - Willravel

10-11-2005, 02:29 PM	#5 (permalink)
777 drawn and redrawn Location: Some where in Southern California	Well, the idea of what a Lady is these days tends to change from time to time. It might depend on how forward one is. For some guys, they'll take the slutty chick home, and take the lady home to meet mom. __________________ "I don't know that I ever wanted greatness, on its own. It seems rather like wanting to be an engineer, rather than wanting to design something - or wanting to be a writer, rather than wanting to write. It should be a by-product, not a thing in itself. Otherwise, it's just an ego trip." Roger Zelazny

10-11-2005, 04:44 PM	#7 (permalink)
GoldenOuroboros The Cheshire Grin... Location: An Aussie Outback	Don't corner him in an aggressive sense, if he's avoiding you and you like him, simply ask him out. Be prepared for him saying something that you may not like, but then he may like this approach from you. Personally being abit shy myself I always waited for the girl to make the first move, some do this and some don't. I like it when they do. Being outspoken doesn't mean that a lady isn't a lady I say go ahead! Just be prepared... and do inform us of what happens. __________________ Can you see me grin grin grrriiiiinnnning?!

10-11-2005, 06:45 AM	#3 (permalink)
Glory's Sun Registered User	personally, I like a girl that can stand up for herself. Tell me to fuck off, or argue with me because she's right. Sure there's a limit to it. A girl who's just shy and doesn't argue or stand up for what she thinks is right is boring to me. Depending on what the guy was cornered for.. depends on if it was right or not

10-12-2005, 12:31 AM	#10 (permalink)
mandy Addict Location: Port Elizabeth, South Africa	there is a limit to how far one can go...but, the best way is just to be honest because it's going to come out in the end if it already hasnt...and...being yoruself always counts.if he doesnt like you for "the real you" then he isnt worth your time.

10-12-2005, 12:41 AM	#11 (permalink)
Uncle Pony Crazy	As long as you're not a brash, drunken whore I don't see a problem with it. Taking him to the side to talk is OK. Cornering him, grabbing his genitals and making lewd comments after he's asked you to leave him alone is not OK. I hate that! I'm not a piece of meat, damn it! I have feelings too! Um, yeah. Anyway, it depends on what you do and what you say once he's cornered.

10-12-2005, 01:00 AM	#12 (permalink)
Cynthetiq Tilted Cat Head Administrator Location: Manhattan, NY	assertive is attractive... boorishly demanding or passive aggressive managing your way is not. __________________ I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not. What's the best nation in the world? DO-NATION!

10-12-2005, 06:07 AM	#14 (permalink)
Redlemon Devoted Donor Location: New England	Rogue, please tell us about the guy you are interested in, a little about yourself, and if he would have any clue that you like him. Concrete examples are always easier to work with. (I gotta stop ending my sentences in prepositions.) __________________ I can't read your signature. Sorry.

10-12-2005, 08:34 PM	#16 (permalink)
joeyaz Tilted Location: Az	I guess a bit of both .99% of the girls I've met have been the forward type they have approached me or I had some alcohol induced bravery. In school and even at work I've had crushes on the shy quiet type but never had what it takes to approach them I'm not sure why..and only with women who I'm attracted to..other women and people in general I'm really outgoing etc..but someone attractive and I clam up unless they make the first move. I really need to work on that!